


The Self Is Not So Weightless

by IHaveTheWrongGlass



Category: League of Legends
Genre: Angst, Character Study, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, KDA Polycule - Freeform, Smut, Starting off 2021 with a mood, Suicidal Ideation, This is just the girls being girlfriends and helping Akali work through some shit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-11 23:15:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 32,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28500609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IHaveTheWrongGlass/pseuds/IHaveTheWrongGlass
Summary: Akali is thrown into a tail spin when her mother reaches out to her demanding that she comes home to Japan. With the help of her girlfriends, Akali works through her trauma and can hopefully put the past behind her.--Title from Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths
Relationships: Ahri/Akali/Evelynn/Kai'Sa (League of Legends), Ahri/Kai'Sa (League of Legends), Akali/Ahri, Akali/Evelynn (League of Legends), Akali/Kai'Sa (League of Legends), Evelynn/Kai'Sa (League of Legends)
Comments: 104
Kudos: 247





	1. Regression

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and welcome to this hot mess!
> 
> K/DA's come back has thrown me into a hyperfixation, so I have attempted to write a fic! I have played League all of 7 times before being bullied off by 13 year olds, so it is suffice to say I don't know much about any of the lore. All I know is that they're sexy and should all be girlfriends.
> 
> Also, sorry for all the music talk at the beginning, I thought I might put my music production degree to some use (finally), but don't worry, it tones down after the first part.
> 
> Without further ado, enjoy! Comments and kudos are much appreciated, tell me what you thought!

Akali bobbed her head to the music, the notes pouring out thickly from the surround sound speakers and pooling on the carpeted floors of the studio. Her mind was clear from everything besides the beat and the honeyed voice crooning through the speakers. They had been in the zone for hours now, the full day had come and gone in a way that didn’t make time feel cyclical. The morning had dragged its feet and then the afternoon sprinted as if to compensate. Studios were like that- cut off from the outside world besides the one (albeit massive) window behind her overlooking the city lights not too far in the distance.

Akali chalked it up to the too bright screens in the too dark rooms with slightly too cold air conditioning. It was always a constant dance of taking off layers when she was concentrating, only to start to shiver and then get reprimanded by her bandmates to put on a jacket lest she get a cold. She was bundled up now, her big jacket slightly awkward in the studio chair as she watched the microphone gains jump healthily between green and yellow.

With a tired smile, she hit the Talk Back button on the mixing board, waiting for the tell-tale _click_ before speaking. “I think that’s good, Ahri-chan. It should be enough for the stacked vocal chops.” She sank into the chair, her butt numb and eyes aching from the bright screens before her.

From the linking window right behind the monitor (which overlooked the recording booth), Akali watched as her Unnie slumped from her ridged singing posture. Fox ears dropped low and the down lights did nothing to hide how worn-out Ahri really was. Crunch time was hard on them all, but as K/DA’s leader, Ahri tended to bear the brunt of the work- much to the band’s chagrin.

The Fox’s voice rang loud and clear in the dark mixing space, the cardioid microphone picking up the rasp of tired vocal cords as they rubbed and the room stereo mics picking up the ambient echoes from the live space. They had been at it for hours on end, recording adlibs and background harmonies to fill stereospace for their up and coming single. The full gang had been in and out of studio, doing pickups and helping with creative input but Akali had been main desk monkey for the majority of the recording process. She couldn’t help it; it had only taken her two takes to spit absolutely fire at the mic and call it done.

Ahri entered the small studio, the heavy soundproofed door a struggle as it swung open into the carpeted room. Akali swivelled around, making sure to save the ProTools file first and upload it to a Dropbox just encase (she had heard horror stories and didn’t want to tempt fate). She stood up, chair bumping into the desk behind her as she strode forward, arms open wide and eyes kind. Ahri took the open invitation, her slight form all but collapsing into the Akali’s sturdier frame.

She caught her with ease, a work worn hand threading into midnight black hair as she felt Ahri nuzzle into the nape of her neck. She curled a strong arm around a slim waist, holding the fox girl close and applying pressure as she gently squeezed. Ahri felt a sigh against her collar bone before soft lips placed a lingering kiss on her breath warmed skin.

Music recording was always a process that seemed to take more than it gave, at least initially. There was an inherent vulnerability borne of standing alone in a room with nothing but a mic and the stares of your peers from behind the studio glass. You were essentially cut off from everyone and everything with the only tether being the talk back system between the desk technician and the artist. And whilst Ahri was more than an old hand at this whole process, she had had some bad experiences in the past with idiot producers and snarky businessmen who had forgotten to put the talk back _off_ before ripping into her.

It was a learnt type of insecurity that Akali knew Ahri had. An almost imposter syndrome that settled in when she closed the door to the recording booth and put those headphones on.

Akali squeezed her one last time, placing a fond kiss between flattened ears before pulling back. She waited a few seconds, gazing down at Ahri’s cute face before Ahri even made eye contact with her. Slit, amber eyes gave way to an anxious state and Akali couldn’t help but lean down and place a feather light kiss against slightly ajar lips.

The gasp she stole was delicious. She couldn’t help but grin only for her gasp to be stolen right back by an eager mouth. Akali gave way easily, body pliant under slightly shaky hands as Ahri grabbed her waist. There wasn’t really any heat behind it, no real drive to _take_ but Akali was all too happy to give Ahri some peace of mind. If making out is what helped the incredibly cute gumiho relax, well who was Akali to complain?

The small of her back bumped into the studio desk, the wood panelling pressing hard into her oversized jacket. Akali didn’t care- she was more focused on the slight catch of Ahri’s fangs against her bottom lip, she was more preoccupied with the slow drag of Ahri’s nails sneaking underneath her jacket, she could only think about the broken motor of a purr that rumbled from the gumiho’s chest as she pushed herself flush against Akali’s body. It was an age before Ahri let Akali catch her breath, lips wet with shared saliva and slit pupils blown in adoration. Akali was sure her own pupils were dilated too- that’s what happens when you look at someone you love, after all.

They wore matching grins, reddened cheeks making their eyes squint just a little. Fox ears stood proud now, satelliting around as they picked up the quiet hum of electricity through the speakers. Other than that, the room was dead silent.

“Fe-” Akali’s voice came out as a croak. Her blush deepened as she cleared her throat. “Let’s try that again. Feeling a little better, Foxy?”

For all intents and purposes, Ahri tried to hide her laughter behind a large hand, her shoulder jumping with each chuckle. Akali couldn’t help but snicker herself, lifting a hand from Ahri’s waist and scratching right behind a fox ear. The fur was velvet under her calloused fingers, her thumb dipping into the pinna as she gently stroked upward towards the top a few times.

It had the desired effect.

The purring kicked up a notch instantaneously as Ahri’s face slackened with something akin to reverence. Akali stole one more kiss, nipping at the Fox’s bottom lip, before pulling away all together and plopping back down onto her swivel chair. The look of betrayal had Akali stifling her own laugh, but Ahri was a professional recording artist, so she turned heel, dragged a chair from the back of the recording room and sat down right next to her girlfriend.

“Alright, so I think we got enough raw fodder to really pad the track out, especially for the chorus.” Akali spoke, eyes not leaving the monitor as she reset the workspace to start the track at the beginning.

Ahri decided to watch what she was doing from the overhead television- it was mirroring the desktop and was much easier to look at. Akali pulled up the virtual ProTools mixer on her second screen, checking that everything unnecessary was muted and that the correct playlist was highlighted. With a look over her shoulder at Ahri, who gave the go ahead, Akali hit spacebar and sat back.

Two bars of the studio mix played before the newly recorded vocals entered, both of them watching the soundwaves with keen interest. They sat like this for 2 hours, going through each and every one of the 72 takes multiple times. Akali jotted down the names of the recordings they liked. She deleted the unusable ones and, honestly, worked her magic in Frankensteining different takes together with crossfades and cuts until they had three versions that they were happy with.

Editing was tedious work, but it was a necessary evil- an evil that Akali enjoyed. Ahri had checked out an hour ago, choosing instead to pack up the sound booth. From her peripherals, Akali watched her reset the whole room- putting away sound walls, unplugging the Talk Back machine and wrapping its long cable up tediously. Akali was quick to hit the phantom power off before Ahri unplugged the mic leads from the walls, properly rolling them up and storing them in the cupboard. Akali pulled out the bantam patch cables from the path bay and neatly placed them on their hook- Ahri’s playback voice smooth over the speakers.

By 4 am, Akali was saving out their work, replacing the Dropbox file and resetting the mixing desk.

“Should we get an uber?” Ahri asked from the doorway, her body slumped against the golden pine wood of the door frame.

Akali took out her phone from her sweatpants pocket, pulling up Evelynn’s chat and noting that she was still online. “Nah, Eve’s still up. I’ll ask her to pick us up, it’ll save us waiting for someone at this hour.”

Before Ahri could even respond, Akali had already hit call and placed the device against her ear. It rung twice before a _too_ cognizant voice drawled though the phone.

“You done, darling?”

“Yeah,” Akali confirmed, a stubborn smile pulling at her lips, “can you pick us up?”

A pause, the phone mic played static against her ear. Then the sound of silk sheets rustling, “Hmmm, I’ll have to think about it.”

“Don’t be like that, Evie.” Ahri stalked over, tail swishing behind her as she got into Akali’s space. “How would it look if you left your girlfriends stranded on the outskirts of Busan?”

“It’s hardly the outskirts, Lovely.” Evelynn chuckled, voice deeper with the late night. The sound of a car unlocking could be heard in the background, “but I cannot have another _scandal_ on my hands, now can I?”

“So, we’ll see you soon?” Akali asked, blowing a puff of air into a fox ear and amusedly watching it flick. She did it again just to be a lil shit. Ahri glared at her.

“I’ll see you in five.”

“But it’s a twenty min- oop, nup she’s gone.” Akali looked at the call ended screen with a sigh. “Honestly, how does she still have a license?”

Ahri shrugged, “it probably helps when you can charm people at the drop of a hat.”

“You say it like you can’t do the same.” Akali grabbed her backpack from the floor and hefted it onto her shoulder. They checked that the doors were locked and that Ahri had the studio key before letting the external door close behind them.

“You’re such a tease,” Ahri pulled her coat tighter around herself, all of her nine tails unfurling and wrapping around the two of them as the stood on the pathway. The cold December air was ruthless. “you _know_ I can’t properly charm people without kissing them. I can only heavily influence them otherwise.”

“I know, I know.” Akali pecked her on the cheek, her cold nose making Ahri jump a little. She pulled Ahri’s hand into her own, interlocking their fingers as they waited. Their breaths wafted in vapours, visible in the cold night of the dark, vacant street. It was times like these when Akali felt alive- drunk tired on sleep with nothing but the night and a pretty lady keeping her company. The turbulent world felt calm at this hour- the façade so thick that even Ahri could forget some of the responsibilities on her shoulders.

Akali wondered what it was like, being alive for so long and seeing so much. Surely it weighed on the psyche. The weight of eternity was immense in its suffocation and cruel in its lessons, and yet here she was, standing next to someone so incredibly kind and giving.

Akali rolled her tired shoulders, tightening her hold on Ahri’s hand with a sigh. A curious head cocked towards her, ears flicking up to attention.

“It’s nothing, just the late hour doing its thing.”

“Ah. It do be like that, sometimes.”

Akali snorted almost violently, body jerking as she whipped to look at her Unnie. “Did you just seriously say that?”

Ahri puffed her chest, a tail pulling free to swipe behind her. “No ragrets.”

“Oh my _fucking_ god- you didn’t.”

When Evelynn rolled up a minute later in all her growling engine and burning tires glory, she found Akali laughing manically as she crouched on the curb. Ahri just shrugged her shoulders as they made eye contact through the illegally tinted glass.

Ahri didn’t expect for the back door of the car to swing open, however. Judging by the sudden shout of “Kai’Sa!,” Akali didn’t either.

Kai’Sa elegantly stepped out the car, arms wide as she beckoned her two girls in for a hug. She stood tall, her head resting above both Akali’s and Ahri’s as she wrapped her long arms around their forms. With greeting kisses to their cheeks, Kai’Sa pulled back and took in their rosy complexions.

“How’s it?”

“Good. Everything’s done and dusted, all that’s left is to hand over to Yasuo for mixing and mastering. Hopefully he won’t have too many notes.” Akali chirped, pulling open the passenger side door and sliding in.

Ahri nodded along, walking around the car and getting into the back seat. The warmth of heated leather greeted them as she sunk into the cushions, her tails collapsing into one and curling into her lap. Kai’Sa reached out and took her hand, her thumb rubbing soothingly at her knuckles.

In the front seat, Akali leaned over and placed a lingering peck against Evelynn’s left cheek. Before she could pull away, however, a clawed hand caught her jaw and dragged her in. Akali grinned into the kiss, Evelynn’s plump lips sticky with gloss and full against her own.

“Hmm, you taste like a certain Fox.” Evelynn cooed, pulling back and letting her prisoner go.

Akali shrugged a smile and threw a look over her shoulder to the back seat. Ahri grinned, “shut it, Eve.”

“Do I need to disinfect the studio, _again?”_ Kai’Sa sighed, looking between the two culprits with stern violet eyes.

“No.” Evelynn answered for them, peeling from the curb and stepping her foot on the gas. “Doesn’t smell like they had sex.”

Akali blushed, smacking Eve on the shoulder and receiving a golden glare over sunglasses in return. They fell into idle chatter, Evelynn breaking almost every road rule possible as she sped through ghost town streets. Streetlights flashed by like a silent metronome, keeping time with the odd safety that accompanied the drive with Evelynn behind the wheel. Even with the way the demon raced down streets, she was never stupid about it- she _knew_ the mechanical beast engulfing them, she’d taken it apart herself and put it back together with more finesse than any master mechanic.

The way Evelynn drove was _dangerous_ and yet Akali felt nothing but safe. So safe, in fact, she was lulled into slumber as her bandmates bickered around her with familiarity.

\--

Akali groaned, rubbing sleep from her eyes as she brushed her teeth. She looked like a train wreck, her hair sticking up with defiance more so than usual. Her pyjama shirt was half off her shoulder, collar bones exposed and dragon tattoo just peaking out the collar. She changed brushing hands, stretching her right arm up over her head until her shoulder popped satisfyingly.

Her mind was heavy, sluggish and _annoyed._ It had been almost three full years since she had any contact with her family and today, of all days, that streak was broken. It was a horrid surprise seeing the message on her phone, the unknown number speaking volumes about the rift between the rapper and her blood.

She spat in the sink, cupping water from the running tap and rinsing her mouth out. Shaking her head, she splashed water on her face and scrubbed, doing her darndest to occupy her mind with literally anything else.

It was weird to think that toothpaste was technically poisonous- sure it would take, like, eight whole tubes to kill someone, but the opportunity was right there. With her morbid morning musings, Akali failed to notice that she company in the bathroom.

Long arms wrapped around her waist, causing the short girl to jump and drop her toothbrush into the sink. She shut off the faucet with a “Holy shit, Bokkie, you tryna to kill me?” and looked at the dancer’s reflection in the mirror.

Kai’Sa grinned cheekily, her hair shiny with sweat and cheeks rosy with exertion. She must have just finished her morning gym workout. “To be fair, I knocked. I can’t really help it if you’re engazi.”

“What do you expect, it’s the morning.”

“It’s 10 am.”

“My point exactly. That’s too fucking early.” Akali grumbled, fishing her toothbrush out the sink and putting it in the holder. Kai’Sa still had her trapped.

“Language, ‘Kali.” Kai’Sa chastised, pressing a happy kiss to Akali’s exposed shoulder, right on the scales of her tattoo. The void pods floating above Kai’Sa’s shoulders hummed happily. Akali returned the gesture, blanching at the wet taste of forehead sweat against her lips. “Anyways, I’m going to take a quick rinse. Your breakfast is in the microwave.”

They parted with Kai’Sa giving her a quick squeeze before ushering her out and locking the door. Akali rolled her eyes, it wasn’t like she hadn’t seen it all before. The dancer liked to show off her body, taking pride in the way she had tuned it perfectly for her lifestyle. No one complained when Kai’Sa frequently traversed the house in a sports bra and tights. Evelynn often took advantage of the fact, pulling the dancer into all sorts of compromising positions against any flat surface available. No one batted an eye, hell, sometimes even Akali joined in the fun.

Speaking of the devil herself, Akali noticed that Evelynn’s door was still closed as she walked down the corridor. She knocked, knuckles rapping against the hardwood before she took a step back. The wait was short- the door creaked open to reveal magenta hair and circular reading glasses. Akali gave a sheepish smile, shoulders bunching at the quirked brow Evelynn shot her.

“I was just wondering if you had eaten breakfast yet?”

Evelynn swung the door further open to reveal a very sheer, very fluffy robe. Akali adverted her gaze, already feeling a blush creep up her neck. She fiddled with the hem of her sleep shirt and kind of regretted the choice of forgoing pants.

“It’s 10 am.”

“So I’ve been told.” A pause, “I’ll take that as a yes.” Akali made to turn heel.

“But I could do with a coffee.”

She stopped, pleased, as Evelynn stepped out of her dark room and threaded an arm in hers. Off they went, down the stairs, hooking a right on the landing and into the open plan kitchen and lounge space.

The kitchen was large and immaculate, marble counters glossed to a shine and cupboards stark white and brand-new looking. The television was on for background noise, playing some infomercial that neither cared to deem with attention. Evelynn hoped up on the counter, crossing her legs and letting her robe ride up to bunch at her waist. A lasher materialised from open air and jabbed the coffee machine on.

Akali opened the microwave to check out her food, chucked on the microwave cover and set it to heat. In the meantime she put the kettle on and pulled out two mugs. She felt the warm, slightly vibrating leather of a lasher wrap around her calf, the scaled texture dragging up her leg soothingly. Akali hummed, Evelynn’s other lasher coiling around her waist and sliding under her shirt.

She let it.

The body temperature metal tip felt nice against her stomach, the sharp edge dragging a white line down her visible abs. She let Evelynn pull her back, her bare feet sliding against the wooden floors until her back rested flush against Evelynn’s front. For the second time that morning, Akali found herself trapped in a cage of limbs. She dropped her head back against Evelynn’s chest, eyes half lidden as she watched the microwave timer count down.

They stayed like that, the coffee machine dripping, the kettle steaming and the microwave humming. Claws idly circled at her hip bone, dipping under the elastic of her boy shorts and running along the V-line of her pelvis. Akali turned her head up, unruly hair tangling further as she pressed a kiss to the underside of Evelynn’s jaw.

“Not right now, Eve.”

The hand retracted, sitting once again at her hip as the older woman curled around her. Her lashers dematerializing as her other hand came up to squeeze Akali’s cheeks.

“What’s eating at you, love?”

Akali furrowed her brow, her pout protruding more with the assistance of Evelynn’s fingers. The microwave started beeping and the kettle was ready a second later. “Nothin’.” She made to get away but slim arms remained iron around her body.

“Nah-Uh, it’s not that easy ‘Kali, I can taste your trepidation thick on my tongue. Whilst delicious, it’s not an emotion that becomes you. So, I’ll ask again- what’s _eating_ at you?”

Akali pulled herself free, her restraints falling to the wayside easily. She poured Evelynn’s coffee, steeped her tea and reclaimed her food. “I don’t wanna talk about it, at least not right now.”

The demon looked at her with unearthly eyes, pupils thin and sharp, but Akali was used to it- loved it even. All she got was a nod, but she knew that Evelynn was true to her word. So, they had breakfast in silence, sitting next to each other and basking in the warmth of the midmorning sun. Akali’s mind descended, once again, into turmoil, the text she had received this morning burning a hole in her mind.

Evelynn shuffled a little closer, a lasher running soothingly up her Maknae’s leg as she grabbed Akali’s idle hand. The rapper intertwined their fingers and squeezed. She had a lot to think about.

\--

“I really want McDonalds.”

“’Kali, it’s 3 am.”

“It’s 24 hours.”

“Not my point.” Kai’Sa groaned, flopping back on the mattress. The sweat from their earlier activities was cooling uncomfortably on her skin.

Akali hopped out of bed, her socks making her slide a little with the motion. Kai’Sa raised an eyebrow.

“Did you seriously keep your socks on during sex?”

Akali wiggled her eyebrows with a cheesy grin. She pulled on a grey t-shirt and pulled on some sweatpants, throwing a matching set to Kai’Sa who caught it with an eyeroll. “I gotta keep my feet warm somehow, baby.”

“You’re insufferable.”

“And yet you still love me.”

“That I do. I do question it sometimes, however.”

“Oi!”

\--

They chose to sit in the restaurant, the place surprisingly busy for the late hour. Akali reasoned that it was a Friday night/ Saturday morning, so people were sobering up a little before going home. Kai’Sa was tucking into a taro pie, the purple filling spilling from the sides and clinging to her chin. Akali smoothly wiped it clean and stuck her finger in her mouth.

“You’re so cheesy.”

“You mean suave. My burger is cheesy.” As if to prove her point, Akali motioned with the aforementioned meal. Kai’Sa gave a disgusted look, taking another bite of her pie as if to avoid comment. Akali took it as a win.

They enjoyed their greasy food with light chatter. The warmth of the restaurant was comforting against the cold dark of the outside world. Kai’Sa was a grounding presence, her voice lilting and calming with its delectable tones. Grace lived in the dancer’s bones, every movement had purpose and rhythm that spoke of Kai’Sa’s soul. Ahri had once described the dancer’s soul as a blinding, scaled white whipped with the deep purple of the void. The rapper had to agree that it fit their Bokkie well.

Akali took another bite. Truth be told, she wasn’t that hungry. The whole trip had been a ploy to get Kai’Sa alone and away from the house. There was something she needed to get off her chest before it imploded within her, but the house had too many ears within it. Out there, in the comfort of strangers , she spoke- the words falling from on edge teeth and cutting Kai’Sa off mid ramble.

“I need to go back to Japan.”

Akali looked down at her fiddling hands, the burger wrapper already partway shredded and her fingers greasy from excess mayonnaise. “I need to go back to the Dojo and pass on my title so my mother can get off my back and-”

“Akali.”

Kai’Sa’s tone cut her off, her jaw clicking shut as she looked up in fear. (Why was she fearful? She never had anything to be afraid of around her girlfriend.) Violet eyes bore into her own, pinning her to her seat and stilling her body.

“You’re about to cry, my Draak.”

As if on cue, her eyes blurred- the world becoming a haze of distorted colour and stilted breaths. Her chest felt tight and hollow simultaneously, the chasm beneath her ribs rattling with every ragged breath. Long fingers caressed her cheeks, thumbs wiping away the moisture from her eyelashes before her pain could fall.

Akali didn’t realised this had been weighing on her so heavily. The emotions had come out of nowhere, lumbering and so fucking heavy as it crushed her shoulders. “I’m sorry I’m such a mess, Bokkie.” She babbled softly, turning her head and placing a kiss into the cup of Kai’Sa’s palm.

“Nonsense, we should have checked in before it got to this stage. You must have been feeling like shit and none of us knew.”

Akali shook her head, letting out a thick sounding laugh, “Eve tried to yesterday, but I wasn’t ready to talk.”

“Well, thank you for opening up to me. But, and you can say no, I think this would be better discussed at home with everyone?” Kai’Sa smiled, withdrawing her hands- fingers soothing over Akali’s jaw as she nodded. She stood, tall and kind as she helped Akali up from her seat. They made quick work of throwing their rubbish away, Akali sculling her drink and tossing it into the bin with a “Kobe!”

She fished for her keys in her pocket, hefting the motorcycle helmets from the booth seats and tossing one to Kai’Sa. She caught it effortlessly, but quickly stole the keys from Akali’s hand. “Eve’s picking us up.”

“But I drove here?”

“Ahri will drive your bike back, don’t worry.”

“But like, why?”

Kai’Sa waited until they were in the parking lot before rounding on her, her free hand resting on the shorter girl’s shoulders. She bent down a little (a lot) until they were level. “Because you had an emotional outburst earlier and I don’t think it’s safe for you to drive.”

“This isn’t how you talk to short people, Kai.”

“Stop deflecting.”

Akali flinched, bowing her head. “Sorry, it’s a defence mechanism.”

Kai’Sa pulled her into a one-armed hug, the helmets making the gesture slightly awkward. That didn’t stop the taller woman from placing a kiss to her temple, a breath huffing into Akali’s hairline.

The growl of an engine cut the quiet night, both of them grinning at the flamboyance of Evelynn’s arrival. The car pulled up to them perfectly, the sleek silver mirror-like in the ambient lighting. The car hadn’t even properly stopped yet when the passenger door flew open, a dark flurry of tails and fur dashing forward and engulfing the pair.

Evelynn was more reserved in her greeting, choosing to instead stand by her car door and eye them over her sunglasses. Ahri was quick to steal Akali’s helmet, ears flattening against her head as she shoved it on. Taking the keys from Kai’Sa, she waved over her shoulder, straddled the bike almost sinfully and shot off into the night- her black tail trailing behind her as she took a turn.

Kai’Sa pulled Akali into the back seat, the dancer chucking her helmet into the front seat as Evelynn revved the engine. They were off like a bat from hell, ties squealing- the smell of burning rubber seeping in from under the doors. They made it home in record time, pulling up next to Ahri leaning on Akali’s bike.

Ten minutes later found them all under heavy blankets, sitting on the couch with hot chocolate in their hands. It didn’t take long for Ahri to step into her leadership role and break the silence, patience wasn’t her strong suit. She rocked forward, head poking past Kai’Sa’s broad shoulders and looking directly at Akali. The others followed suit and suddenly the youngest member had the sole attention of the group.

She took a fortifying sip, keeping the warm milk in her mouth before swallowing audibly. “So, yesterday morning I got a text from my mother.” Akali started, hands already starting to fiddle with the mug in her lap. Evelynn shifted closer beside her, sensing the sudden shift in emotions that dampened the living room. “She wants me back home before the new year.”

“I didn’t even know you had a mother. You’ve never talked about her.” Ahri broke the quiet, voice hushed and delicate. Akali looked at her Unnie, a small sardonic smile pulling at her features.

“I have a dad too.” She joked, trying to lighten the mood a little and failing miserably, “there’s nothing much to say, if I’m being honest.” Another sip, this time Kai’Sa pressed a chaste kiss to the side of her head as Evelynn dragged long fingernails against her forearm. “I was born, they took one look at me and decided I wasn’t what they wanted.”

Ahri growled lowly, her ears flattening into her dark hair. “What the fuck does that mean?”

Akali shrugged, suddenly feeling too warm in the embrace of so many bodies. “Traditionally the Tethi family is carried on by male heirs. Without fail, the first born has always been a son. As I’m sure you all know, I’m decidedly _not_ male. Okaasan had trouble falling pregnant, so I was a miracle or so I am told. I’m just not the miracle they wanted.”

“Bull fucking shit.” Evelynn rumbled, her voice dropping so low it bordered on otherworldly. Kai’Sa’s hackles rose, her second skin thrumming as it tessellated down the arm pressed against Akali’s thigh. Ahri placed a comforting arm around the dancer’s broad shoulders, thumb rubbing soothingly over Kai’Sa’s borrowed grey shirt.

Wisps of black smoke pooled from under the blanket, tendrils running over Evelynn’s form as her human like hands elongated and turned to shadows. Akali grabbed her lover’s wrist, bringing a palm to her lips and placing a kiss on the cold, solid, darkness.

“It is bullshit, I see that now.” Akali placated, dropping her head down against Evelynn’s shoulder, not minding the shadows wisping against her cheek. “But I still need to go back home.”

“No, you don’t.” This time is was Ahri that spoke up, her body leaning so heavily over Kai’Sa’s that she was practically on her lap. “You owe that woman nothing.”

Akali felt her face droop, her brows low and jaw slack. Kai’Sa ran a hand through Ahri’s black hair, fingers rubbing at the base of a fox ear, watching it flick as violet eyes seemed lost in thought.

“It’s not about ‘owe’, as such, Ahri-chan.” Akali shifted, “despite my parents less than stellar _parenting,”_ Evelynn scoffed at the word, “I still need to give the Dojo back my title. I defected from the order- I broke my vows. The ceremony is in 2 weeks. I’m going to attend and then wash my hands clean of the whole thing.”

Silence settled heavily across the living room. Everyone was still, quiet, as if their collective breath was held. A large hand came to rest of her knee, the palm warm and void skin free.

“I think you mean _we._ ”

\--

“Unnie, I can’t possible let you come with me! It simply isn’t feasible.”

“You’re not changing my mind, Akali.”

“But what about _FOXY_ and _Charmed_? It’s the holiday season!”

“I came out with a new collection for both product lines in October, sales are up by 40%. You can’t weasel your way out of this, Maknae.”

\--

“Bokkie, you’ll listen to reason. You guys can’t come with me, this is something I have to do on my own.”

“Good thing you’re not talking reasonably. Now eat your food.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

\--

“Eve, you know tha-”

“If you finish that sentence, I’m crashing this car.”

“I-I love you?”

“Oh honey, I love you too.”

\--

She sighed, the distressed wooden bench clinging to her jeans and micro ripping the fibres. It was quiet, the world muted by sensible sleeping patterns and the fact that it was very fucking early. A grey tumultuous sky lumbered overhead, the clouds low enough to warrant comment. It was too early in the Winter season for it to snow, but stranger things have happened.

Akali pulled her double layered hoodie tighter around herself. Well, in actuality it was Kai’Sa’s hoodie, the sleeves bunching on her much shorter arms and the cuffs engulfing her hands. Thick woollen socks poked out from under her beaten high-tops, the soles so warn that you should see her footprint in the treads. Her snapback was backwards, pushing her unruly ponytail down like a makeshift, scratchy scarf around her neck. 

She brought a cigarette up to her lips, pulling a drag and letting it sit in her lungs. The smoke was acrid, harsh and biting but it gave her something to do while she wallowed. It was a week before she had to go home, the plane tickets were booked and her bags were half packed. Her room was a disaster zone, more so than usual, but the girls let her be.

Exhale.

Smoke curled from her nostrils, clinging and permeating as it dissipated into the early morning air. The sun was threatening to rise, its rays ghosting off the ocean as the waves crashed on the shores below. She loved the beach but didn’t like sand. So, Akali sat on her lonesome park bench right before the line where grass met shoreline. She took another drag.

\--

Ahri scented the air, wrinkling her nose as she stepped into Akali’s space.

“I didn’t know you smoked.”

Akali shrugged, pivoting around the gumiho and fetching a glass of water from the kitchen. She heard footsteps following her, but she ignored it in favour of sculling her drink, leaning against the counter and feeling her overheated flush recede. The house was very warm.

Placing the glass down on the marble, she grabbed the hem of her hoodie and pulled it over her head, uncaring with decency as her shirt went along with it. She just needed to get cooler.

“Where did you go?”

“Out.”

Silence.

She watched as the fox took measured steps towards her, bare feet padding against porcelain tile and tail dragging behind. Ahri didn’t touch her, she knew better than that- she’d dealt with enough of the rapper’s shit to know how to handle her. So they stood in painful, oppressive silence until Akali couldn’t take it. Until the quiet ate at her mind and forced her to move. She turned almost angrily, grabbing the slightly taller woman by the shoulders and pulling her into a tight hug.

Ahri’s bare arms felt amazing against her exposed skin. The light, downy fuzz that covered the gumiho’s body was soft against her aching back. Ahri wasn’t hairy in a traditional sense, but she did have a light dusting of fur that almost imperceivably covered her from head to toe. It was only really noticeable when the afternoon sun would catch her just right, the fibres holding scattered light and gifting her a warm glow.

“I’m sorry for snapping.”

Ahri took Akali’s hat off, dropping it to the floor unceremoniously and pulling her ponytail loose. The hair wasn’t clean, laden with sweat and grime from the last few days- nevertheless, Ahri buried her nose in it. The smell was so intrinsically _Akali_ that is made her chest swell.

“Apology accepted.” Akali moved her arms to hug at Ahri’s waist. “We’re here for you, Rogue. We’re family, don’t you forget that.”

“I know.” Akali took in a deep breath, shifting her head up and blowing into a fox ear. Ahri nipped her, feeling her Maknae chuckle against her chest. “It just feels like I’ve been suddenly caged after being free for the last few years. It’s like I’m regressing, but into what, I don’t know.”

Ahri hummed, “I may have some insight, if you would like to hear it?” She felt Akali nod. “When you experience trauma, it’s something that you carry with you throughout your life.” She started.

Akali scoffed, “I’m not traumatised. I was never abused, my parents never hit me unless it was in class.”

Ahri pulled back so she could look into Akali’s dark blue eyes, her expression stern. “Physical abuse is a type of trauma, yes, but not the only one. Trauma takes many forms, many of which people don’t recognise as trauma at all and are therefore ignorant towards it their whole life.”

“So, if they’re ignorant, then what’s the point? It won’t affect them.”

Ahri sighed, “it doesn’t work like that. Traumas can lay latent unless something triggers it. That’s what I think happened when your mother texted you. How have you been feeling?”

Akali clenched her jaw, eyes alight with fire as she looked at her Unnie with defiance. Ahri took it in stride, leaning forward and placing a soft kiss to her maknae’s jaw. She lingered, feeling the muscles shift ever so slightly until everything slackened. Akali flopped into her arms, the heavy weight pushing the gumiho back into the counter as the rapper hid her face against her chest.

When Akali spoke, her voice was thick and wobbly. “I feel on edge, like there’s an itch in my bones that won’t leave me alone. I don’t think my heart rate has settled down properly in the last week and I just can’t keep still. I-… it’s like I’m stuck in motion? I have to keep moving, keep doing things because if I stop, if I rest, then suddenly it’s like she’s there judging me for my idleness.”

She choked back a cry, hands tangling into the loose cotton of Ahri’s shirt. “God, Ahri, I lived most of my life trying to prove myself to my mother- to show her that I was _worth_ it, that I was worthy of the name I was born into. It was never _fucking_ enough,” she gripped tighter, knuckles as white as the cotton itself, “she always had comments- on my forms, my dress style, my grades. **Fuck** she didn’t even attend the celebratory dinner when I finally took the title as Fist of Shadows.”

Akali suddenly stilled. Ahri had never felt her so tiny.

“I tried to kill myself that night. Tied the noose, tried to write a letter only to find out there was no one I wanted to address it to.”

The admission dropped like a stone, the words so broken that Ahri had trouble computing them. Instinct took over, her tails unfurled and wrapped them in a belts of fur as Ahri dropped them slowly to the floor. Akali was cradled in her lap, her face wet against Ahri’s now ruined t-shirt as she began to sob.

“I-I,” a gasp, “I obviously failed,” the words warped with laboured breaths, “another score on the list. A f-failure at -”

Ahri hushed her, fangs bared. “The self is not so weightless.” Her words spilt from a human voice, barrelling down into something uncanny and eternal. “Listen to yourself, Akali. Understand the gravity of the words you are speaking. How can it possibly be a failure to live?”

“Existence hurts, Ahri!” Akali raised her voice, shoving her body back but was unable to gain freedom from Ahri’s arms and tails. Anger and pain blazed in her eyes, spittle stringing between her lips as she bared her teeth, “I’ve tried so damn _hard_ to please, to make something of myself.”

“But you have!” Ahri bared her teeth right back, ears flat against her skull as amber eyes ignited. “Look at how far you’ve come!”

“But it’s never enough.”

And, just like that, all the fight left Akali’s small form, voice so soft after righteous shouting. “When Pop/Stars came out, I spent a full month waking up every morning, hoping to get a text from her. Anything to show that she cared. It never came, so I deleted the number and put it to rest.”

Ahri settled, her body relaxing against the cabinet behind her. Her teeth turned more human as she felt her hackles lower. “An abuser is never pleased. You didn’t do anything wrong, Rogue. I know you don’t believe that now, but hopefully you will in time.”

It was an hour later that Evelynn found them still on the kitchen floor, both sound asleep in a mess of skin, fur and ruined clothes.

\--

The box was hefty in her hands, the lid covered in a thick layer of dust that spoke of its disuse. She wiped it clean with her palm, watching the dust cake into motes and stick to her skin. With a delicate touch, she flicked the latches open and lifted the lid.

A set of five kunai sat proudly in all their engraved glory, blades so black they mirrored the world around them. Akali pulled one from its bed, the familiar weight was sure in her palm, her fingers aching to twirl the weapon and hear the sharp blades sing. It had always been one of her favourite sounds, the hum of a blade cutting the air. It was almost otherworldly when combined with the sound of shifting material in a silent dojo.

She deposited the weapon back, placing the box on the floor and just drinking it all in. She hadn’t opened the case since she had left the dojo, the dishonour of defecting weighing too heavily on her shoulders. But here she was now, sitting in her disaster of a bedroom, looking at the pinnacle of her past and hoping she could move forward into a brighter future.

She had been given the set upon mastering the kunai and receiving her title. The joy she had felt when Master Shen proudly placed the box in her hands, by gods it was glorious. She remembered looking at her peers- at her community- so proudly, eyes scanning the crowd looking for the one person she wanted to show off to. The one person she wanted to be proud of her. Akali remembered the drop of her gut when she couldn’t spot her mother. 

She traced the engravings littering the entirety of the weapons, motifs of dragons and clouds depicting a scene of battle. This set had been passed down her family for generations, moving from male heir to male heir as they mastered the craft and took responsibility to teach a new generation the martial way.

Akali shut the lid, flicked the clasps closed and put the box back under her bed.

\--

“You know you don’t have to sleep with me.”

“That’s not something I hear often.”

“That’s not what I meant, Eve. You know that.”

Akali pulled off her shirt, unclasping her bra and letting it drop to the floor by her bed. Evelynn stood in the doorway, her teeth worrying her bottom lip as she drunk in the view. Akali pulled out her ponytail, toeing off her socks before flopping down on the mattress- ready for unconsciousness to take her. She felt the bed sink next to her. She opened her eyes only to be greeted by magenta hair and a wide grin.

The incoming kiss was expected, but that didn’t stop her from groaning, mouth opening to take more of Evelynn in. Her body sunk into the mattress as the demon moved to straddle her, hands tracing her defined shoulders and kneading straining muscles.

Akali shifted her head, their noses bumping as they drew apart. “I’m not a child.”

“Hell, I hope not. Even I wouldn’t stoop so low.”

Akali smacked Evelynn’s arse, face pulling into a scowl. Evelynn grinned deliciously, pupils widening as she dipped down to bite Akali’s soft lip.

“I meant that you don’t have to baby sit me, I can take care of myself.” Akali lisped, body curving as Evelynn _pulled_ , stretching her lip just shy of tearing. Nails dug into her chest, trailing blooming scratches across Akali’s skin that blossomed into an angry red. The rapper groaned, back arching into the sensation as Evelynn traced tight circles around her nipples.

“Why take care of yourself when I can do it for you, love?” The voice rumbled from Evelynn’s full chest, devilish lips peeling back to reveal sharp canines.

Akali whimpered when Evelynn bit the base of her throat, teeth digging into the cord of her neck whilst a hand yanked down her sleep shorts. Curly hair greeted the warm room air, the patch neatly trimmed and absolutely drenched in arousal. Akali blushed. Grabbing a fist full of Evelynn’s ponytail. She pulled- taking satisfaction in the curve Evelynn’s neck as they met face to face.

Akali could already feel the bruising on her neck, the indents of teeth were raw and angry as she bent her neck to take in the vision straddling her. She pulled harder, forcing Evelynn even further back with a hiss as she grabbed for the belt of Evelynn’s robe. Untying the knot, the cool silk hung like curtains- framing a Rubenesque body that made Akali _whine._

Evelynn was soft yet toned, her body naturally curvy and perfect to hold and yet so strong it bordered on terrifying. Still holding her head back, Akali used her now free hand to peel off the robe. She knew Evelynn was letting her have her way, letting her lead and set the pace. Akali was happy to comply- to take some control when life was making her feel powerless.

The silk fluttered down, agitating the flared scratches littering her chest. Shifting her hips, Akali flipped them. Pushing her lover into the pillows and kicking off her own shorts and underwear. Evelynn’s eyes glowed in the dimness, serpent like pupils languidly tracing over her body.

“I want to put that smart mouth of yours to good use.”

She climbed up Evelynn’s body, taking her time to trace full hips and the slight swell of her belly. She took note of the clear slick coating weighty thighs, magenta curls trimmed into a small triangle like an arrow pointing down to Evelynn’s arousal. She placed a kiss to a flawless sternum, feeling a deep, heavy pulse beat against her lips. She smiled, inhaling the smell of gooseberries and motor oil that clung to the demon’s skin like a musk.

Evelynn must have grown impatient, for clawed hands caged around Akali’s toned thighs, hauling her up and pushing her over Evelynn’s shoulders. Akali grabbed the headboard, knees bracketing red tinged ears. This was a sight she could never get used to- Evelynn’s almost drunk expression as she sat prettily between her slick thighs.

“Eat me out, baby.”

\--

“You guys smell like sex.” Ahri muttered, taking a sip of coffee and flipping though the newspaper. Kai’Sa sat next to her, reading the sports rag and munching on a piece of toast. Neither of them looked up.

“I bet, they were at it till the early hours.” Kai’Sa quipped, flipping a page to check out the rugby scores.

Evelynn chuckled behind Akali, possessive arms threading around her waist as a pointy chin dropped on her shoulder. “You should have joined, our little rogue had quite the bit of energy. Sometimes you just got to pound it out.” Akali felt a blush tinge her ears.

“Urusai.” She groaned, earning a chuckle from her shoulder demon.

“Don’t worry, Rogue. They smell like sex too.” Golden yes landed on the two at the table, their faces reddening rapidly.

Kai’Sa cleared her throat, starting quickly, “I caught Ahri at your door-”

“You were leaving your room too, Kai!” Ahri cut her off, placing her mug down and swatting at the dancer’s shoulder.

“So you two just decided to fuck each other instead of joining us.” Akali deadpanned, loving how uncomfortable they looked. Evelynn preened behind her.

“Language.”  
“Yeah pretty much.”

“I love this for us.” Akali smiled, kissing Evelynn on the cheek and detangling from her arms.

Breakfast was a relaxing affair. Kai’Sa was taking a break from cooking, forcing the household to eat out all the leftovers before they took off tomorrow. Akali took advantage of the situation, piling her plate high with noodles and peeling a boiled egg. Evelynn brewed her black coffee, a lasher opening the fridge and pulling out a left-over pizza box from two nights ago. Kai’Sa got up and brewed another cup of tea, letting the green tea steep as she properly greeted her girlfriends.

It was then that she noticed the _very_ heavy bruising at the base of Akali’s throat. “Fok Evie, did you try and eat her?” She pointed at the bite, dark and tender. As if to show it off, the rogue stretched her neck back, smug grin in place. The dull throb felt delicious, a flicker of pleasure igniting at the base of her brain.

Evelynn chuckled, taking a sip of too hot coffee. “I did eat her, multiple times in fact.”

Ahri groaned, head dropping to the cool marble counter.

“You should see my stomach.” Akali boasted, leaving her plate on the counter and hiking up her sleep shirt.

“Were you sharpening your nails on her, Eve?” Kai’Sa gasped, bending to get a better look. Her violet eyes wide as she looked up (the image was making Akali’s head a little fuzzy). “You look like a scratching post, Rogue.”

“Thank you.”

“Make sure you take care of it,” Ahri peaked from her position, her ears and tail giving away her rapt attention despite her aloof manner, “and wear high collars, _please._ We’re literally going to the airport tomorrow; I do not want a scandal.”

Akali waved her off, hiding how her throat felt thicker all of a sudden. “Sure, boss.”

“Good girl.”

Akali shoved noodles into her mouth to the sound of Kai’Sa snickering.

\--

She swirled the amber liquid around her mouth, once, twice, before letting it glide down her throat. The ice cubes clinked as she set the tumbler down on the coaster. Her backpack was sitting reassuringly against her feet, passport secure in the inside pocket of her jacket.

The airport was busy- as to be expected for the festive period. The hustle and bustle of people excited to get away from their daily lives was infectious. Long queues filed before the checking-in counters, bag drop service staff argued with a lady who refused to pay for overweight bags, and the unique mix of spoken languages only found airports was starting to give Akali a headache. Everything just seemed so normal, so mundane in juxtaposition to the utter turmoil wreaking havoc in her stomach.

She took another sip, letting the bottom of the glass fill her field of view. Through the warped perspective, she watched midnight hair come into view. She put the empty glass down, eyebrows quirked at her visitor.

Ahri stood across from her, legs almost touching the small table between them. Her ears, all four of them, were covered with a beanie and her tail was glamoured into nonexistence. It was always odd seeing the gumiho passing as a human. There was just something so inherently wrong with the image that it made Akali frown. Ahri tended to hide her fox features when at airports, it helped disguise her so they wouldn’t get harassed by fans. The idea of someone so godly demoting themselves of a human appearance was criminal. Still, her whisker markings remained in full view.

“May I join you?”

“You never need to ask.” Akali gestured to the seat beside her.

Ahri dropped her carry-on bag at her feet, hiding it under the table as she picked up a menu. “It doesn’t hurt to be polite.”

They were at the first-class lounge bar, the atmosphere much quieter compared to the rest of the airport. Various businesspeople poured over spreadsheets, others talked quietly on the phone, a few slept on the loungers and a mother was rocking her child to sleep on a couch. Evelynn and Kai’Sa had gone to check out the bookstore a few gates down, their luggage also under the table by Akali’s feet.

“You want to share some chips with me?” Ahri asked, flattening the laminated menu against the tabletop.

Akali grabbed the menu from her hands, ensuring that she dragged her pinky over Ahri’s pronounced knuckles. They were in a public space, she had to follow the rules.

“I’ll go order.” Akali stood, chair dragging softly behind her. Ahri made to stop her, but the Maknae patted her reassuringly on the shoulder.

The bar wasn’t busy, the bartender was cleaning glasses and reading a book behind the counter. Akali waited till he turned a page, not wanting to interrupt, before walking up and grabbing his attention. She ordered a large chips, garlic bread, a coke for her companion and another whiskey double for herself. The bartender had ID’d her the first time, not believing her when she said she was legal. At least this time he didn’t ask to see her passport.

When she returned to the table, noticing that a packet of sugar or two was missing from the holder, she sat down even closer to her girlfriend. Making sure no one was looking at them, Akali subtly placed a hand on Ahri’s bony knee. Ahri took the opportunity to take a selfie for socials, making sure Akali’s empty glass was out of frame.

She plastered on a smile, pulling her unnie closer and chucking up a peace sign. Ahri gave her own toothy grin. The photo was up on Instagram not a moment later. No sooner had it gone up did they both get a notification of a new post from Evelynn.

Akali snorted, taking in the pic of Kai’Sa doing the splits against a bookshelf with Evelynn placing books atop her head, shit eating grin firmly in place.

“Who even took the photo?”

Ahri looked at the credits, “Apparently the store manager.” She said with a chuckle, liking the photo and pocketing her phone.

“Honestly, why can’t those two just be normal.” Akali sighed good naturedly, shaking her head. Her arm was still on Ahri’s knee but neither of them chose to comment.

The food came in a timely manner, the waiter placing the carb heavy meal between them before putting their respective drinks down. Akali saw Ahri eye her whiskey, amber eyes narrowing as Akali grabbed it to take a sip.

Maybe if she was drunk enough, she would be able to forget the lead weight in her stomach.


	2. Limbo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A wild chapter appears!
> 
> Thank you so much for the warm reception last chapter, I'm honestly blown away! I didn't expect anyone to read this hahaha. I love a good pleasant surprise :D
> 
> Reminder that I'm making everything up that's lore related, so take things with a grain of salt.
> 
> Enjoy and if you're feeling generous, comment and kudos too! :P

That lead weight did not subside. In fact, it only got worse, sinking deeper and deeper in her alcohol filled stomach until her mouth was thick with the urge to vomit. The plane ride was smooth with almost no turbulence, or at least that’s what Kai’Sa told her. Akali had spent the hour and fifteen minutes strung high from a cocktail of alcohol, peanuts, and the crushing weight of trepidation. Much of the flight was a blur of intrusive thoughts and mental barriers.

The leather of the seat creaked from her white knuckled grip, fingernails digging in like claws. Her jaw was set tight, teeth pressing against each other so hard Akali could hear the rumble of her inner ear muscles. Her heart hammered against the cage of her chest- angry at the bones keeping it in place and wanting nothing more than to lay as a gory bloody mess on the carpeted floor.

The sensation only grew worse as they descended, the plane landing so smoothly that Kai’Sa clapped. Akali would have clipped her shoulder if she wasn’t feeling so ill.

Presently, they sat at the train station, waiting to board the Limited Express Haruka to Kyoto Station. Everything smelt like the sea, the ocean rough against the manmade island of Kansai Airport and roaring in the cold, _cold_ air. Even the late morning sun did nothing to defrost their numb fingers, instead forcing them to huddle for warmth like penguins in the Antarctic. Well, more like Akali sandwiched herself between Ahri and Evelynn, taking full advantage of their above average temperatures.

The station was busy and loud- the platform teeming with people embarking on holidays or returning home to loved ones. Akali was both and neither, feeling off kilter with the familiarity of the air in her lungs against the almost violent desire to _get out of here_. All she had to do was board a plane and she could be in her bed in no time. Her home was a mere 2 hours away, just a short dip in the Sea of Japan and she’d be there.

She shook her head, banishing the silly thoughts and earning a look from Evelynn. An arm slung over her hunched shoulders, pulling her small frame into Ahri’s warm body. Evelynn shuffled evermore closer, a pale hand enveloping the rapper’s, a finger tapping thrice on her knuckles. Content for now, the rapper looked down the platform for her other girlfriend.

Kai’Sa had gone to explore a vending machine that she had spotted, her outgrown purple hair poking out from her scarf and beanie combination. The strands caught like muted fire in the weak sun, blazing with a fierceness that complimented the dancer. Akali had a sudden urge to tuck the stray strands away, to pull her Bokkie by the lapels and drape her long body over her lap like a blanket.

Damn, maybe she _did_ drink too much.

They got on the train without much effort, relaxing into the high back seats for the 75 minute trip to Kyoto Station. The train car was filled with muted chatter, the volume level comfortable and present. Akali took a seat across from Ahri, Evelynn and Kai’Sa choosing to sit across the aisle. Their bags took up much of their leg room, making them of all cramped and slightly awkward. That still didn’t stop Kai’Sa from falling asleep on Evelynn’s shoulder. (Akali may have taken a sneaky snap, just for her own private viewing).

It was well into the ride when Ahri finally broke the stilted silence.

“I want to visit a shrine.”

Akali looked up from the obento Kai’Sa had bought her a stop ago, her rice filled chopsticks lowering from her mouth as she looked at Ahri. Sunlight streamed in through the clear train windows, casting her Unnie in sharp relief and highlighting the slight fuzz on her face. Ahri had finished her own obento. The empty container sat neatly on her lap; her chopsticks secured with a rubber band. Akali felt the breath hitch in her throat, her chest burning with the sudden punch of the gumiho’s beauty. Golden eyes caught her off guard.

“Oh?” Her mouth felt like cotton, tongue scratchy, “do you have any in mind?”

A rueful grin broke across a stunning face, a fang peaking out slightly with a pleasant hum. Ahri looked like the fox that caught the canary. “I do.”

That was it. That was all Akali got. She didn’t bother pressing for more information, taking her waiting mouthful of rice and not playing the gumiho’s little game. That lasted all of five minutes before Ahri was leaning in from the seat across from her- body folding neatly as she closed the small space between their seats.

“You’re not going to ask any questions?”

“Nup.” She spoke around a mouthful of fish. Ahri made a face but didn’t back away.

“Didn’t you ever learn to not talk with your mouth full?”

“My mother didn’t teach me anything.” Akali deadpanned, shoving a piece of octopus into her mouth defiantly.

Ahri flinched, a remorseful look eclipsing her grin. Her mouth small, “I didn’t mean it like that.”

Akali hummed, taking a moment to swallow. “I know, I’m just being a shit.” The grin on her mouth was fake- heavy and evasive. They both knew it but neither said a word. Ahri leant back and looked out the window, watching ocean morph into city.

Shit.

“Fine, I’ll bite. Which shrine would you like to go to?”

Ahri instantly perked up, her beanie shifting slightly with the movement of her ears.

“It’s a surprise.”

Akali couldn’t help but smile, the corner of her eyes crinkling.

“Consider my interest quipped.” 

\--

“Seriously Eve? This is the transport you booked?”

“You said I could get anything, Foxy.”

“But a _limo_?”

“I agree, it’s a little excessive.”

“Thank you, Bokkie. At least someone here has sense.”

“I dibs sitting next to the bar!”

“Akali!”

“Oh you’ll just love the champagne I ordered, darling.”

“Eve!”

“Hurry up, gumiho. Let’s not keep the driver waiting.”

\--

“Holy hell Eve, how much did you spend on a hotel?” Kai’Sa whistled, marvelling at the marble floors and high ceilings. Evelynn shot her a smirk, lifting a brow. She bowed dramatically, pulling a laugh from both Ahri and Kai’Sa. Turning around with a wink, Evelynn fell into perfect Japanese with the desk clerk who seemed a little thrown with the sudden which.

“We have money to burn, Kai.” Ahri supplemented, pushing Kai’Sa jaw up with a single finger and pressing a kiss to her cheek.

Akali was quiet as she took in the massive lobby. It was complete over kill- the building a long monolith of marble, glass and that clinical smell that accompanied the liminal space of hotels. It was beautiful, don’t get her wrong, but it was very much to Evelynn’s tastes- grand, flashy, and over the top.

Kai’Sa pulled a pamphlet from the tourist wall, opening it up and all but shoving it in Akali’s face. “Look, they have a pool.” A pause as Kai’Sa read it upside down, “oh! There’s a gym-”

“I refuse to work out.” Ahri interjected.

“No one is asking you to, Ahri-chan.” Akali droned, her attention elsewhere.

“-and a spa.” Kai’Sa finished.

“Now that I can get behind.” Ahri said delightedly, clapping her hands at the prospect.

Akali gently lowered Kai’Sa’s hand, moving the pamphlet out of her face and sidestepping the giant of a dancer. She paced over to Evelynn, watching as the demon charmed the clerk with well-placed eye contact and a teasing lint to her tone. Drawing up to Evelynn’s elbow, the clerk didn’t so much as spare her a glance. Akali had seen it before, the vacant adoring stare, the unguarded expression of absolute adoration. The poor man was _deep_ under Evelynn’s spell, his eyes slightly glazed, and his words half swallowed around his sluggish tongue.

With a gentle hand to the elbow, Akali dragged Evelynn’s attention away from her entertainment. A sharp look cut the conversation short. Akali was tired, all she wanted to do was set down her bags and lie on the nearest soft surface.

In record time they were shown to their rooms by a lovely yukata clad woman. She walked with short, hurried strides. Her back was arrow straight and elegant, capped off by rounded shoulders and a kind face. Her smile never left her nude lips. It was still present when she bowed and opened their room door. Akali wondered if her cheeks hurt.

The apartment was massive. Tatami mats covered the majority of the floors- giving way to tiles for the small kitchen and carpet for the two more western styled bedrooms. The rest of the apartment was very Japanese in décor- from the kotatsu in the dining room to the sliding soji that separated the various rooms.

She strode in, right on Ahri’s hidden tails, lugging her suitcase behind her as she went to claim the furthest room. Before she did, however, she was brought to a halt by the view _._ Just off the main living room area was an apartment-long balcony overlooking the Kamogawa River.

The world was alive outside and Akali felt like a stranger. She dropped her bag, not even registering its resounding thud on the tatami mat as she slid open the balcony door.

She stood, hands on the wooden railing as she took in the surroundings. She’d seen this river a hundred, nay, a thousand of times before. It wasn’t anything special, just flowing water between two manmade banks. Hell, it wasn’t even sakura season but still, Akali couldn’t advert her eyes. It felt like the world had been spinning for the last few days. Rotating slowly at first. So slowly that she didn’t even notice, but it continuously gained speed until her legs wobbled and her stomach wanted to spill.

Now though-

Now it stood still. Correct. Stagnant.

Akali hated it. She hated the familiarity of the wind. She hated the smell of the old city. She hated the way people talked with a cadence so alike her own. It felt like meeting a long-lost friend, so much in common but the relationship was time aged and strained- a mirrored reflection of what once was.

The apartment came to life behind her. The kettle stared to boil, someone was unpacking, and someone else (probably Kai’Sa) was rooting through the kitchen cabinets. Their footfalls were reassuring and their mutterings murmurous, soft but present. Akali paid them no mind. Instead she stood, looking over a world she regretted leaving behind.

\--

“Guys, I’m legit starving.” Akali’s stomach rumbled in agreement. She blushed, wrapping her coat tighter around herself.

“I literally made you a sandwich in the room and we all had tea.” Kai’Sa sighed, cocking a brow at the shorter woman.

“I can’t believe you brought a packet of Zoo Biscuits from home, Kai’Sa. We have full reign over the hotel bar and snacks and here you are bringing your own from home.”

“I didn’t see you complaining as you shoved two in your mouth, Foxy.”

“Shut it, Eve.”

“Hmmm, I don’t think I will.”

“Don’t make me shove something in your mouth, Siren.” Ahri threatened, stopping in the street to glare at the demon. Evelynn drew to a halt, turning haughtily to look back at Ahri, grin boarding on predatory. People parted around them, throwing annoyed looks at the stagnate pair. Kai’Sa grabbed Akali by the shoulder, pulling her out of her hunger related thoughts and forcing her to a stop.

“Oh? Is that a promise, gumiho?” A fang caught on Evelynn’s lower lip. Her tongue poked out as if to scent the air.

Ahri groaned and Akali quickly stepped in before anything scandalous could happen. She looked comical as she stood between them, looking left and right, trying to gain their attention. “How about we all go get ramen? Does that sound good? I think we’re all hungry and I know a place not too far from here.”

\--

They were indeed hungry, finishing their food in record time. Ahri sighed in content, patting her slightly protruding stomach happily. “I think I’ve eaten enough for the week.”

“You’ll be hungry in two hours.”

“Wow, way to call me out Bokkie.”

“Just telling the truth.” Kai’Sa wiped her hands, dabbing at her lips and then depositing the tissue into her empty bowl.

They didn’t linger. Akali paid the bill, her card not even properly in her wallet before Ahri had her by the wrist and was pulling her out the door. Evelynn just shook her head, grabbing the rappers forgotten snapback off the table.

\--

“Where are we going?” Kai’Sa called out, her hands cupping over her mouth to project the sound further. She ran to try and catch up but Ahri was too fast, even for Kai’Sa’s ridiculously long legs. Akali felt like her arm was about to be ripped off with the force Ahri was tugging it with. Her feet stumbled every other step as she was dragged along. Her protests fell on deaf ears, so she bit her tongue and tried her darndest to keep up.

They came to an abrupt stop at a taxi rank- Akali full body slamming into Ahri’s brick wall of a body. The gumiho didn’t so much as budge. Akali groaned, yanking her sore arm free and ringing her wrists with a scowl. Evelynn was nowhere to be seen.

“What the hell, Ahri-chan. What’s the big rush?”

“You’ll see.”

That was the only response she got before being shoved into an awaiting cab, landing arse first on worn seats and pressing into Evelynn’s quickly materialising form. Shadows dripped off the demon’s body, congealing and writhing until finally solidifying into warm flesh. Kai’Sa joined them in the backseat, cosying up to Akali’s left and shutting the door after her. Ahri took the passenger seat a moment later, grinning at her girls and winking at Evelynn who raised a brow in return. Akali was so fucking confused.

Akali didn’t have a clue if the driver noticed his extra passenger. He just peeled from the curb quietly, professionally, the radio was soft and his were eyes forward. Ahri finally settled down but Akali noticed the slight movement of her ears under her beanie.

She bit back a smile.

\--

Akali knew exactly where they were going. “I am not wearing the right shoes to go hiking.”

Ahri glanced over her shoulder, looking at the rapper’s high tops and shrugging. “You’ll be fine. Eve’ll carry you.”

“I will not.”

“Wow Eve, that’s cold hearted.” Kai’Sa whistled. “Don’t worry ‘Kali, I got you.”

“Thank you, Kai. At least _someone_ here cares about me.”

Akali grinned at the apologetic kiss to her cheek, wiping off the purple lipstick before placing her own on a high cheek bone. Evelynn rumbled her appreciation, nipping at Akali’s jaw before quickly pulling away. They were in polite company, after all. That didn’t stop a sneaky lasher from coiling around her leg, however, the metal head toying at her pants hem and ghosting over a flash of ankle.

Kai’Sa slung an arm around her shoulders, her large warm hand squeezing Akali’s bicep. Akali sank further into the seat, enjoying the easy affection and lancing her fingers with both Evelynn’s and Kai’Sa’s free hands. She grinned even wider when they both started drawing circles with their thumbs in tandem, neither looking at each other and yet perfectly mirroring the movement.

Ahri’s amber eyes flashed as she watched them in the rear-view mirror.

\--

Arashiyama was breathtaking- acres and acres of natural bamboo forests and mountainside sprawling as far as the eye could see. Rocky ground gave way beneath unhurried feet, the undergrowth thin but no less lush. Everything was varying shades of green, yellow, and brown. Giant stalks of bamboo lording over them so tall that Akali could feasibly believe they went on forever.

They were alone here- no company besides the monkeys in the canopy and the occasional deer they startled. Ahri revealed her preferred form, her many tails swaying behind her as she followed her nose through the forest. Kai’Sa was hot on her heels, her second skin taking its favoured pod form, gently floating at her shoulders. They did the occasional flip as if excited by their new surroundings.

Evelynn kept pace with Akali, her footsteps confident as she looked on ahead. Her body wafted between corporal and solid, swirling with imperceptible air movements as her lashers flowed behind her like streamers. Akali kicked a stone, watching is sail through the air and land with a thud. Ahri looked back at her, ears at attention.

“Are we almost there?” They’d been walking for almost an hour now and her feet were sore. These shoes were definitely not made for this.

Ahri stopped, drawing Kai’Sa to a pause beside her. The fox waited for the other two to catch up, her tails brushing the leaves on the floor with a lazy swipe. Something seemed off about her, nothing physical that Akali could name. Her eyes were still amber, the pupils neither blown nor slit. Her nails were still blunted the way she liked them. But there was something about her countenance, an almost divine intelligence lurking behind a coy smile and a subtle head tilt.

Evelynn also picked up on it, halting exceedingly close to the gumiho and grabbing her right hand. Akali watched, a little dumb founded, as without a word the succubus cut Ahri’s forearm with a wicked sharp claw. The motion was clean, the cut mild and precise. Golden blood shimmered to the surface, pooling with tension before breaking and cascading into Ahri’s cupped palm.

Akali started, taking a step forward only to be stopped by a lasher pressing to her chest.

“We actually just arrived.” Ahri gave a fanged smile, pressing an unsullied finger to Kai’Sa’s lips before she could interject. The dancer looked to Akali, the both of them were concerned and extremely confused. Evelynn looked disinterested but the way she worried her bottom lip gave her away. Something was afoot.

Well, _duh._

With gravity, Ahri clenched her bloodied fist. Golden drops fell, viscus and honeyed as they hit the Earth.

_One._

The forest turned quiet. Akali felt the hairs on the back of her neck rise.

_Two._

Kai’Sa grabbed her hand, her second skin wrapping itself over Kai’Sa’s shoulders like molten, scaled silver.

_Three._

Nothing. Absolute stillness, the air suddenly rife with invisible pressure.

And then, out of nowhere, a gale birred through the trees- the force so strong it made Akali shield her face reflexively. She yelled, feeling her breath steal from her lungs as her cheeks wrinkled against the power. Kai’Sa’s grip turned painful, pinning her to place as a lasher secured itself around her waist. Akali caught a glimpse of light so bright it burned before she was forced to close her eyes.

The world shut to a purple black; her eyelids backlit so she could see the blood vessels through translucent skin. She gritted her teeth, leaning forward with the slightest hope that she could shift her centre of gravity. Today was _not_ the day Akali Tethi would die.

With a rumble so deep that the Earth shook beneath her feet, it was over. Just like that. She overbalanced, falling forward against the safety belt of a lasher and the buckle of Kai’Sa’s arm, sagging with exertion.

Once again, Akali could _breathe._

The first thing she did with that breath was yell.

“What the _fuck_ , Ahri!” Akali’s voice turned coarse, the pure adrenaline pumping through her veins making her heartbeat so fast it probably broke a world record. She felt tears bead at the corners of her eyes, a vain attempt to replenish some of the moisture stolen by the wind. “What the fuck was that!?”

She tired to shove off her restrains but they were steadfast and unforgiving. Despite that, she stalked forward, body so wound it felt like she’d been shocked by a live wire. Kai’Sa was forced to let go lest she be dragged along. Akali felt the blood return to her hand, the meat of her palm white from the pressure.

Ahri met her step for step until they stood toe to toe. The lasher remained around her waist, the warm leather vibrating softly as if to comfort but she ignored it. She wanted nothing more than to push it off, to turn and punch a tree, or rave and hurl something. She got to do none of that. No. Instead, her face was bracketed by two large, soft hands before she was pulled into a searing kiss.

Akali wanted to be angry but she was only human; she melted, falling into the sensation eagerly. She needed to expend the energy somehow and this seemed a lot more constructive then destroying the foliage around them. Her angry fists grabbed as Ahri’s scarf, pulling the slightly taller woman _closer_ , making her neck bend almost uncomfortably. Ahri enjoyed it, tilting her head and deepening the kiss. A broken motor of a purr started up in her chest, the force of it vibrating Akali’s hands until they started to numb.

A warm body pressed up behind her, lithe arms encircling her hips as talons toyed with the hem of her drop crotch pants. Evelynn pushed the hood of her jumper away from her neck, biting at the exposed skin and forcing Akali to break her kiss with a gasp. Kai’Sa took the presented opportunity, threading a hand into the rapper’s messy ponytail and pulling her in, Kai’Sa’s grin making them bump teeth before giving way to tongue. Ahri kissed along her jaw, moist lips leaving a trail of spit as she made her way to Akali’s ear, tugging at the ear lobe with a cheeky fang.

With airy breath, she huffed directly into Akali’s ear the way Akali liked to do to her, “as much as I want to take you right now, that would be ill advised.”

Akali drew back from Kai’Sa, placing a soothing palm against her beautiful face as she turned to Ahri. Her thumb stroked a soft cheek, groaning when it was pulled in by a hot mouth. “What?”

Evelynn withdrew her hand, a claw making a shallow scratch just underneath her navel. Akali leant into the sensation, only to be denied with a pleased hum against her back. “We’re on purified ground, Rogue. We shouldn’t sully it.”

Kai’Sa turned her head, the thumb ‘popping’ out of her mouth. She pressed a kiss to Akali’s palm, fully withdrawing from the embrace as if nothing had just happened. Akali secretly envied Kai’Sa’s uncanny ability to switch off her libido.

“Then why did you start making out with me?” She was even more confused. And worse, she was turned on.

Ahri shrugged, shit eating grin firmly in place. “Believe it or not, it’s the fastest way to get you to calm down.”

“Oh, she isn’t calm. We can both smell her,” Evelynn cooed, nipping once more at the bite mark she had made before letting Akali go. The rapper blushed at the statement, shifting her weight self-consciously.

Ahri tutted, but Akali caught the way her nostrils flared and her pupils blew. “Fine, I’ll be more precise.” Ahri looked at her Maknae, “It was the quickest way to convert your anger.” She then looked over Akali’s shoulder to address Evelynn, “Happy? You minx.”

“Hey guys, was this always here?” Kai’Sa called, cutting Akali’s embarrassed retort short. Her voice was a lot further away than it was just a minute ago. They all looked over. Akali’s eyes widened at the sight.

That definitely wasn’t there before.

Where there previously was a clearing now stood a behemoth, ancient tree. It’s trunk aggressively twisting in on itself as it reached for the heavens above. Roots, so thick they may as well have been trees onto their own, clawed into the Earth almost violently, as if the ground hadn’t expected the sudden intrusion. The moss and grass adorning the base juxtaposed that fact, showing that the tree had indeed been there for an age- maybe even eons.

Akali looked up in wonder, her feet moving on their own accord. She approached. What she assumed to be strange white flowers thickly coating the chaotic frenzy of branches were in fact paper charms. Her brows pinched, mind racing as she tried to make sense of what she was witnessing. They ruffled with the breeze, the fluttering sound almost deafening but not cacophonous or out of place.

She vaulted over a root, the bark so rough under her palm it created microtears only deep enough to sting. She sidestepped upturned dirt, trudging on jagged rocks and almost slipping on green moss until she finally made it to the base of the tree. Only then did Akali turn around, the weight of the expectant stares lifting her from bewitchment.

“Ahri,” confusion painted thick on her face, “why do you have a soul tree?” Her voice travelled the distance between them easily, the words projecting in the quiet forest.

Ahri’s ears flattened in response, her brows hiking up at Akali’s question. “Why am I not surprised that you know what this is?”

“I know about a lot of things.” A pause, Akali gestured to the ridiculously large tree with wide arms, “this is the first time I’ve seen one of this magnitude.”

\--

Akali’s legs swung beneath her, her feet just shy of touching the ground. She was next to Kai’Sa, whose legs were very much planted on the floor, as they both sat on an exposed spirit tree root. Ahri chose to sit on the ground, her tails fanning out behind her like a rug of dark fur. Her hands were occupied with messing up Evelynn’s hair, who’s head rested on her lap. The demon’s scowl grew deeper and deeper with each passing minute, much to Akali’s bemusement.

“So you’re telling us that this is w you and Eve met?” Kai’Sa asked, looking between the two.

“Yeah.”  
“Unfortunately.”

Ahri swatted at a prim and proper nose, flicking away a retaliating lasher without batting an eye. “I don’t even remember the exact year, but the world was a really different place back then. This forest was still in its infancy, the trees just gaining their height and the sky still visible.”

Evelynn smiled, lashers flopping once more against her stomach. “Yeah, I remember that. I happened upon you on a full moon night. The forest was so bright that I had to squint to see anything.” She huffed, Ahri looked down at her, “I remember being really annoyed that I couldn’t see very well.” Evelynn turned to the other two, lowering her round sunglasses to at look them directly in the eyes. “Sunglasses wouldn’t be invented for a few thousand years yet. Life was miserable without them.”

Kai’Sa barked a laugh, causing Akali to grin and look over at her girlfriend. Fuck Kai’Sa was attractive. She didn’t let the thought linger. Shifting in her seat, she looked back down at her two Unnies. “But why the soul tree? To be fair, it’s kind of fitting that you two would meet at a living representation of a grave.” She tried to joke, but it fell flat.

Ahri’s eyes dropped, her mouth turning sullen as she took in a deep breath. Akali felt her body brace, picking up on all of Ahri’s bodily cues before her mind could fathom her blunder. Evelynn gently brought the gumiho’s fingers out of her hair, lacing together their digits and placing a kiss to Ahri’s knuckles. That was all the pop star needed before she began to speak.

“Do you know how gumiho are created?”

The question was soft, almost shy but earnest.

“Not really. The only one I’ve met has been you.” Akali said, head cocking to the side in thought. “I know that kitsune are foxes that have lived for a thousand years and then gain a new form. It is the same for gumiho?”

“Yes, essentially. Expect, instead of transforming straight away like a kitsune, us gumiho are born through a baptism of fire.” As if to prove her point, Ahri snapped her fingers- sparking to light a small blue flame that hovered over her index. “More precisely: fox fire. It’s why gumiho are traditionally seen as ill omens while kitsune are more like pranksters.” She waved the flame out, returning to Evelynn’s awaiting hand.

Kai’Sa looked up, violet eyes taking in all the paper charms before whipping down to look at Ahri. That was _her_ handwriting on those wards, inked permanently on whisper thin sheets. The words were too muddled and faraway to read but they were enough to clue together a story of woe. “Baptism of fir- Ahri, is this the grave of the people you’ve killed?” The words were stilted, disbelief coating each syllable.

Ahri’s ears flattened further but her gaze didn’t drop. Amber eyes steeled, her posture straightening. “Yes. This is the home of all the souls I’ve taken. A resting place for the lives I’ve cut short in hunger.”

Akali shuddered. It was one thing knowing that her lover was a killer by nature, but to be confronted with the fact in such a visual manner was sobering to say the least. The tree didn’t feel as majestic as it did five minutes ago. “I-” she swallowed to wet her dry throat, “I don’t really know what to say.” The statement came out more like a question.

“You don’t have to say anything, darling.” This time Evelynn spoke up, her sunglasses folded neatly on the floor as she looked at her. “We’re monsters, even if we’ve been here as long as, if not longer than, humankind.”

“I _know_. It’s just a lot to take in, is all.” Akali stressed, Kai’Sa nodded beside her. Kai’Sa was a monster too, just one forged not born. She had her own kill out, needing to feed her second skin whenever it grew hungry, but it was nothing compared to this. Akali joked that Kai’Sa was the Edward Cullen of void spawn, choosing to hunt animals over people if possible. Now the joke didn’t seem so funny.

Akali didn’t even want to think about Evelynn’s body count.

“You need to eat, I get that. But why even have a soul tree?” Her Korean slipped, words morphing into Japanese as her brain ran a mile a minute. She hopped off the root, starting to pace. The nervous energy needed somewhere to go. “Why have a grave?”

“Do you know how I eat?” Ahri asked, also speaking Japanese to match. Akali stopped mid stride to look at her.

“That’s not an answer.”

“Humour me.”

“Fine. You consume souls and liver. That’s all I know.”

“Correct. But it’s a little more nuanced than that.” Ahri nodded, a tail thumping behind her. “When I eat a soul, I am consuming it in unto myself, melding it as part of my body and, by extension, my own soul. But when a gumiho is made, we don’t have a soul. We’re just a cavernous being with an insatiable need to _eat_ \- to be _full._ ”

“So, the souls you eat become your own?”

“Precisely.” Ahri took in a deep breath, “that’s why when I turned from a fox to a gumiho, I went on a war path. Eating and eating and eating everything and anything that had a soul. I killed so many, Akali. I bathed in their blood and took and took until I came to consciousness here, in this forest with blood stained hands and a coat so mattered I was more gore than fur. I finally accumulated enough to have a soul of my own, something patchworked and bastardised, but something that afforded me a mind.”

“I had followed her,” Evelynn started, sitting up and placing a kiss to Ahri’s cheek. The fox gulped, her throat bobbing. “The destruction she caused was a great source of agony and suffering, so from her wreckage I was also fed. I chased Ahri from town to town, always a day or two behind to feast on the grief of the grieving until I stumbled upon our fox here, shaking and terrified out of her mind.”

“I was feral.”

Kai’Sa stood up, only to fold herself next to Ahri and pull her into a side hug. Ahri leant into the embrace, dropping her head on a broad shoulder. Akali also sat on the ground, crossing her legs and taking in her girlfriends. “And then what happened?”

“My mind was a riot of the memories from the souls I consumed. All their fears and grievances were driving my new consciousness insane. I needed to make it stop, to put to peace the emotions I had stolen.”

“So I helped her. I was well fed because of Ahri’s destruction, so I decided to put her mind at ease.” Evelynn added, a hand reaching out to Akali’s. She took it, shuffling a little closer, joining their mishappen circle. “I had been alive for a few decades already, morphing into existence after a bloody war, so I had picked up a few things from fellow demons.

I took a seedling from the young forest floor and grabbed Ahri’s wrist.”

“I fought her, lighting my body on fire as I tried to free myself.” Ahri almost smiled, ruminating. Akali stored the information for later.

“But, being a hell spawn, I’m impervious. I held her down and gashed open her forearm and coated the seedling in her blood.” Evelynn smiled. “I planted the seed right here and before our very eyes, a young soul tree grew.”

“With every branch I could feel the noise in my brain quieten until eventually I was left with the terrifying ability to actually think.” Ahri looked at the tree, pointing to the paper leaves. “Those charms are wards for my victims stolen memories. Each one helps keep at bay those memories, those moments, so I don’t have to live with them. I know it seems unjust- that I should be shackled with the consequences of my actions, but at least this way I actually have some humanity.” Ahri ended.

“Is that why gumiho are so rare?”

Ahri’s breath hitched, eyes wild and misty. She nodded, not trusting her voice. Despite herself, she spoke in garbled words. “It’s a cursed life, Akali. We’re driven insane by the very thing that sustains us. Most of us are killed before we go mad.”

Akali scooted over, pulling her Unnie into a fierce hug that Ahri returned, her hands grabbing the back of Akali’s hoodie. She pulled the fox into her lap, feeling Ahri’s legs wrap around her waist as she body trembled. “Thank you for showing us this. That takes a lot of courage, Unnie. I love you, this changes nothing.”

Ahri broke in her arms, body wracking with sobs. The other girls pulled them into a group hug, the pressure comforting in the face of their reality.

“This is the first time Ahri has ever shown anyone her shrine.” Evelynn hushed into the fox’s hair, Ahri nodding into Akali’s now wet collar bone. That’s when Akali understood this for what it was- a display of trust, an evening of ground after her own breakdown in the kitchen. A soul for a soul. Oh, how deliciously their positions were reversed.

Akali fell even more in love.

\--

“You have to try this squid.” Kai’Sa stuck out a skewer in offering, a roasted honey squid speared clean through. Akali took a bite, humming in delight at the burst of flavour on her tongue. Kai’Sa smiled charmingly at the expression, stealing a quick honey coated kiss before darting away with a “I’ll go buy you one!”

Akali didn’t even have a chance to refuse, the dancer already swallowed by the crowd. She lowered her outstretched hand, shrugged, and returned to her own food. She stuffed her face with her takoyaki, looking for her other two companions in the bustling crowd.

The night market was teeming with a constantly shifting sea of bodies. The street was lined with stalls of all manner, delectable steam rising from boiling pots and dispersing into the hungry crowd. Oil crackled in fryers and grills burnt lines into tender flesh. People shouted to be heard over the din, exchanging money for fried foods and desserts. God, Akali missed being at night markets. It had honestly been too long since she’d been in the thick of a crowd, the strangers uncaring of her status aside from if she was moving or if she was an obstacle they had to get around.

Ah! There.

She spotted Evelynn’s magenta hair, predicably at the open-air bar. Akali watched as her lover downed a cup of sake, the bar tender already passing her another before she even put the first cup down. Akali weaved through the sea of bodies, darting in-between families and accidently breaking up a couple holding hands. She put her hands up in apology before ducking away.

Masterfully avoiding being taken out by the errant elbow of an enthusiastic teenager, Akali slid up beside Evelynn. She placed some money on the bar’s counter, knocking on the scarred wood twice and nodding at the bar keep. The bar tender handed her a cup, taking her notes and dropping dirty coins in her palm as change. She grimaced, pocketing the shrapnel and grabbing her cup. She took a small sip, choosing instead to savour the cold liquid on her tongue instead of downing it one go. She had decorum, despite what Ahri says. The sake was surprisingly smooth for a night market.

“What’s a pretty lady like you doing all alone in a place like this?” She teased, leaning close to Evelynn and taking another small sip.

Evelynn looked at her over her glassed, the corner of her mouth lifting into a smirk. “I could ask you the same question, beautiful.”

Despite herself, Akali felt her cheeks redden. “Because we’re both so lonely, would you like some company- just for tonight?”

“Oh how forward.” Evelynn sipped her own drink, golden eyes drinking Akali in. Akali preened under the attention, loving the weight of the gaze lingering on her body. “But you’re cute. So sure, you’ll make some nice arm candy.”

Akali put a hand to her chest, wounded at the statement. “I’m very talented in other departments too.”

Evelynn full on smiled, a fang peaking out. “I’ll be the judge of that.” She downed her drink.

“Follow me then, my lady.” Akali shot back her own. Putting her hand on Evelynn’s lower back. She guided them out of the busy street to a much quieter side alley.

\--

“That’s it baby, grind against my thigh just like that.” Akali groaned, pinning Evelynn to a stone wall.

Evelynn moaned into her cheek; nose pressed achingly into her cheekbone. Lipstick smudged purple streaks against Akali’s skin. Clawed hands grabbed the rapper’s hips, forcing Akali up harder with each thrust as Evelynn rubbed herself off through their clothes. Despite the layers between them, Akali could feel how wet she was. The idea of Evelynn staining her pants’ leg was driving her wild.

Akali shoved her hand down Evelynn’s underwear, the elastic biting the back of her hand. Fingers roughly parted messy folds, pulling a keen whine when they found a stiff clit. Evelynn jumped with a gasp, sunglasses falling down her nose and eyes glowing. Akali stole a kiss as she felt her lover shudder in her arms, moaning with the slick coating her fingers.

\--

“You guys smell like sex, holy fuck.” Ahri groaned, pulling them both in for a hug. Her nose wrinkled but Akali knew it was all for show.

“Have you seen Evelynn? I couldn’t help myself.” Akali evidenced, rocking back with a shrug. No one could blame her.

Evelynn laughed, pulling the rapper into a possessive side hug. She lifted her nose haughtily, “don’t worry love. Ahri fucked Kai’Sa behind the ramen shop. You should watch your sodium intake, Foxy. I hear it’s a silent kil-”

Ahri dashed forward, branding Evelynn’s mouth with her palm whilst Akali lost it, bending over with a gut-wrenching laugh.

\--

Akali toed off her shoes, shoved on her slippers and all but ran to her bedroom. She catapulted onto the bed, her body sinking almost immediately into the down feather blanket. Kai’Sa was quick to flop on top of her, Akali sinking even further with an “oof.” She swore her back cracked.

“Kai, you’re fecking _heavy_ bruh.”

“How rude.”

“I can’t feel my ribs.”

“Doesn’t sound like my problem.”

“It will be when Ahri and Eve find my corpse.”

“You make a good point.”

\--

Ahri was practically vibrating beside her, her body swaying with the force of her hidden tails. They were walking down to the spa. Both Kai’Sa and Ahri wanted to check out the baths- the hotel boasting open air hot water pools for relaxing. Evelynn tagged along; fluffy white towels were stacked in her arms, her head resting atop the stack adorably. Akali had nothing better to do and she didn’t really want to be alone, so she tagged along.

She had made it very clear that the room has a very functioning shower and tub, but Ahri couldn’t be swayed. Something about group bonding and comradery. Akali held back from reminding their dear leader that they all fucked on the regular, they couldn’t get any more _close_. She shifted the wicker basket in her hands, the weaving digging into her palm uncomfortably. Soaps did not a have right to be this heavy.

It was late, bordering on morning, so with any luck they would have the onsen all to themselves. The changing room was deserted, the absolute lack of used lockers boding well for them. Akali quickly undressed, pulling her top over her head and decking her pants in one go. Not bothering with folding, she shoved her cloths in an available locker. Grabbing a towel off Evelynn’s and wrapping it under her arms, she pushed aside the curtain and entered the outdoor area.

“Fuck, it’s so cold.” Her feet stung from winter’s bite.

“Duh.”

“Shut it, Bokkie.” Akali glared, jaw clenched as she (carefully) ran to the nearest steaming pool.

The place was surprisingly large for a hotel in the middle of the city. There were three pools, all various sizes and all filled with beautiful, murky, steaming water. The place had natural stone floors and all the pools appeared to be carved or surfaced with smooth stone.

Akali dipped her toe in, hummed, then yanked off her towel and sank into the water without further ado. The warm water did wonders for her aching body, her head flopping back to rest against the stone lip of the pool. She didn’t care if her hair got wet, it was a mess anyway (like usual).

Kai’Sa slid in gracefully beside her. Her long hair was in a bun, the bun itself a faded purple compared to the natural back of her outgrown roots. It looked like she’d attached a fake bun to her head- Akali told her as such. They laughed, relaxing into the bath and letting the water work over their tired muscles. Akali couldn’t help but study her companion, watching rapturously as Kai’Sa took in a deep breath, her chest expanding under the water, and exhaling with a hum.

How the fuck did someone make breathing look attractive?

Thick eyelashes dewed with the steam, making them look even fuller as Kai’Sa lolled her head towards her. Eyelids opened slowly; violet eyes dark in the dim setting but no less stunning.

“Man, Eve really loves your neck.” Kai’Sa’s eyes focused below Akali’s face, taking all the visible marks littering her body. “That bite from two days ago is only just starting to fade. At least the other one on your nape isn’t too bad.”

“It’s nothing a little makeup can’t fix.” Akali waved off, pressing a finger to said bruises as if to check their vitality. Yep, still ached.

Kai’Sa chuckled at the action, shifting a little closer to press her own hand to the bruise. Her hand wrapped around easily, hitting both spots in one motion. Akali knew it was coming, yet she still gasped at the light pressure of the dancer’s strong hands enveloping her neck. She swallowed against it, enjoying the resistance a little too much. The way her larynx caught against the ridge of Kai’Sa’s fingers was _sublime_.

Kai’Sa squeezed.

Akali groaned, mind fogging like the water surrounding them.

Ahri cleared her throat and they jumped apart like caught teenagers. Small waves lapped at the edge of the pool, Akali’s face a bright crimson as Kai’Sa smoothly ran a hand over her own hair. There Kai’Sa was again, being all unaffected and cool.

“Let’s not mark up our little Rogue anymore, please. At least for today?” Ahri asked mischievously, her tail swaying languidly. “We have a good impression to make tomorrow, let’s not hurt our chances further.”

Akali’s shoulders drooped. That’s right. Tomorrow was the day they’d head up to the dojo- by the Gods she was dreading it.

Evelynn slinked up behind the Fox, arms draping over Ahri’s pointy shoulders and resting heavily on the strong frame. “Let them have some fun, gumiho.” She nipped at Ahri’s nape. With a swift movement, Evelynn grabbed the towel keeping the singer’s modesty. Before Ahri could protest, she tugged, loosening the knot and letting it go freely.

The material came off with flare, fluttering to the wet ground and leaving Ahri naked and open. Akali’s pupils blew, taking in the way Evelynn slithered a hand down Ahri’s body without missing a beat. Fully extending her arm, Evelynn grabbed a fist full of the emollient fur of Ahri’s treasure trail. She tugged, enjoying the way Ahri’s hips rocketed forward at the motion before sinking nails into a toned stomach and _dragging_ up. Ahri whined and Akali whined right along with her.

She caught the gleam in Evelynn’s golden eyes, but Akali didn’t linger. Instead she was more preoccupied with watching Evelynn’s hand thread through the thick, soft fur covering Ahri’s pubic mound. Kai’Sa moved behind her, wrapping an arm around Akali’s waist and copying Evelynn’s movements. Long fingers parted slick lips and the rest was lost to the cold night air.

\--

The perceptible world was asleep- deep breaths, heavy chests and a light hum of content. Minds fell from reality, lost to the imagination as their bodies repaired themselves after a long arduous day. Moonlight pooled through clear glass windows, glowing softly through paper walls and lighting the apartment with ambient softness.

The world was asleep and Akali was not.

No. She wasn’t in her bed, amidst the tangle of limbs, tails, pods, and lashers. (She never understood why Evelynn insisted on getting multiple beds. They always ended up in one, no matter the size.) She didn’t seek refuge in the cage of warmth her girlfriends exuded. It was a paradise Akali didn’t deserve. 

Instead, Akali found herself shivering in a too thin robe, naked and achy, standing on the balcony and breathing in the crisp night air. Her hair was wild, slightly damp and sex mused, tickling her shoulders and worrying her eyes. She brushed the strands away with a shaky hand before returning it to the smooth timbre railing. She leant bodily against it, looking down at the dark footpath below with keen interest.

l'appel du vide, that’s what Akali told herself it was. Kai’Sa would probably get a kick out of the name.

The drop was sizable, three storeys high and dangerous. The wind was soft, the night cold and the urge strong. It would be so easy, just a shift of weight, a gentle tip of movement and a holding of breath. If she stood on the railing and jumped up, it would be just that little bit more of a fall. Maybe then she wouldn’t need t-

No.

What a fucking stupid idea. She wasn’t that weak. What would be the point of ending it all here? Of cutting her little life short by jumping off a balcony because she was scared of her mother. She was a fucking adult. That woman had no power over her anymore, didn’t have a say in her life or how she lived it.

Akali took a drag of the steadily burning cigarette between her fingers. The smoke curled nice and deep, resting menacingly in her lungs as she held her breath. A fag end was already snubbed against the railing, the black ash a scar on the polished wood.

Exhale.

Her nostrils burned slightly as the smoke poured from her nose. She didn’t even bother watching it curl, her mind too lost in thoughts to see. That didn’t last long. A sigh resounded behind her, the softness echoing off the concrete underfoot and rattling the bones in her body. She startled but played it cool, shaking off the scare with another puff. The noise was disappointed but not chastising; Akali knew who it was immediately.

“I haven’t tasted melancholy this thick since Albert Camus.” The voice spilled like gasoline- thin, fast, and quick to ignite. Akali fiddled with the lighter in her pocket. “He did have a better taste in tobacco however.”

The whisper of silk, the cold breeze of smoke, a brush of a stolen kiss, and Evelynn was by her side. They stood, shoulder to shoulder but not touching. For a demon that lived off physical contact, Evelynn knew when to withdraw (it was something Ahri had been teaching her after an unfortunate incident in Rome). Akali took another puff, offering the cig to the demon and raising a brow when it was accepted. So much for criticising her choice of cheap tobacco.

She watched the stick burn that violent orange yellow; the paper being eaten by embers only to be shrouded by grey smoke a moment later. Evelynn’s eyes glowed like that cigarette, dangerous and deadly but oh so addicting.

“I’m not Ahri, I won’t wait for you to start talking.”

Akali chuckled quietly, accepting the cancer stick back and snubbing it out next to its brother. “What is there to talk about?”

In lieu of an answer, a lasher materialised by its own will. Evelynn frowned at it, tutting at its stubborn existence and sighing as it curled around Akali’s ankle. The rapper knew Evelynn didn’t have full control over them. They were more an extension of her emotions than her will, and in all honestly, Akali found the act quiet charming.

She felt the other lasher coalesce into physical form against her palm, head butting it like an attention seeking cat. She grabbed it gently, her thumb stroking the soft length of it with the scales. She made the mistake of going against the scales once and almost lost an arm. She’d learnt her lesson.

Evelynn shuddered beside her, Akali watching her chest rising and falling deeply from her peripherals. With a cheeky smirk, she brought the snake like lasher up to her lips and gave it a little kiss. The lasher vibrated against her lips, making her mouth tingle with a pleasant hum. They dematerialised quickly after that, falling into non-existence as if they were never there.

“You make me weak.” Evelynn’s voice was coarse, as if she had swallowed sand.

Akali shook her head, turning fully to her lover with a rueful smirk. “Weak? Whatever do you mean?”

Evelynn moved like lightening, pulling the younger woman in for a hug. Her human hands grabbed Akali’s robe, pulling her in tight and almost forcing Akali to return the gesture. Her mood soured, realisation dawning like a war unannounced.

“You know.”

It was a statement, dry and simple. Yet it sat heavy and ugly in Akali’s chest as her mind worked overtime. “Did Ahri tell you?” Accusation cut like a razor, opening a wound in her own chest.

“No. She wouldn’t betray your trust like that.” Evelyn was quick to reassure. “Even if I’ve known her for longer than most are willing to remember, she’s loyal to her family.” Evelynn hushed, drawing back and peeling herself from Akali.

She looked at the younger girl, establishing eye contact and keeping her expression open. Blue met gold and Akali knew Evelynn was telling the truth. “Then how?”

“I know the smell.” Fuck. “I can see it on your soul.” _Fuck._ “It’s faint, don’t worry, but wounds like that leave scars that I can see as clear as day. It helps with picking out potential meals.”

“So, then you’ve always known.”

“Yes.”

“Then why come out here now? I’m not going to jump.”

Eve turned away from her, looking out onto the dark river. “Who would I be if I didn’t provide comfort to my mate?” A pause, a sigh. Evelynn’s hands clasped together, hands in a state of constant motion. She spoke again, softer now. “I must admit I was scared when I awoke and didn’t see you.”

“You? Scared?” Akali scoffed.

“I know, right? How uncanny.” She licked her lips, “There’s a certain scent humans give off when they contemplate dying. It kind of reminds me of coffee, if the milk was off and the beans were burnt.” She waved a hand flippantly as if she was discussing the weather. Her eyes darting in the dark night, reflective and bright as if she was reading a prewritten script. “Which I find amusing because Camus likened suicide to coffee and- well, I digress.

Either way, love, you smell like burnt, off, coffee and I panicked. The relief I felt when I saw your silhouette against the night sky was sobering.”

Akali turned around, back leaning against the railing as she looked back into the apartment. The bedroom door was ajar, but she could hear no movement aside. She tipped her head back, eyes searching the polluted skies and coming up starless.

“I won’t jump, Eve.” The words felt like a lie on her tongue. She didn’t mean for them to be.

“It didn’t smell like it, love.” The admission was like an arrow through the heart.

Fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so that was... a lot. Don't forget that if you're struggling, do not be like Akali and seek some help. Bottled emotions do not age well, okay?
> 
> I hope you had a good time and I'll see you next chapter!
> 
> If you want, find me on my socials!  
> @ihavethewrongglass on tumblr  
> @TheRightGlass on Twitter


	3. Confrontation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy valentines! This one is a doozy hahah..... oof
> 
> Big thanks to the lovely partyonsaturn for helping me out with Afrikkans ('cause I'm hopeless. Someone come take my South African card, I don't deserve it rip).
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter! Sorry it took so long to get this out, I rewrote a lot of it like, 100 times.
> 
> Please tell me what you think in the comments (I'm a little insecure about this one hahaha..ha...haaaa).
> 
> Happy reading :)

“You’re not eating.”

Akali grimaced, her stomach turning at the smell of eggs and toast as she pushed her plate aside. She instead picked up her small bowl of okayu but found the white rice dish unappealing on all fronts. Something about its gloopy texture made her feel a little ill. She set in down in favour of clasping her hands around her condensing glass of orange juice. The water droplets swelled between her fingers, running in little rivulets before seeping into the hotel’s white tablecloth. Beyond that, Akali made no move to even acknowledge Kai’Sa, let alone her question.

Evelynn sipped her tea- having forgone coffee for once- and looked between the two.

No response was forth coming.

Kai’Sa sighed, pulling Akali’s abandoned plate towards herself. “You’ll need your energy.” Her tone was doting, warmly exasperated as she got to work. Long fingers wrapped over shiny silver cutlery, the knife and fork slightly awkward in her too large hands. She cut the meal into smaller, bite sized portions, the egg neatly covering the toast.

Akali’s grip around her glass tightened.

Kai’Sa’s knife scraped against the plate, the noise cutting the din of the breakfast area. The hotel was busy. Wealthy travellers perused bustling stations. Chefs did their best to manage the long queues as oil sizzled and sue chefs scurried about with all manner of utensils. The juice bar was in constant need of refilling as children mixed all sorts of abominations. Normally Akali would be right alongside them, mixing things that would make the average person sick, and then downing it with gusto just to make Kai’Sa a little queasy. Today, however, their loud happy voices grated on Akali’s ears.

Ahri was held up at the omelette station, her plate was half full of baked beans and bread and dangerously close to toppling over as the singer was lost in thought. Only at the behest of the person behind her did she notice, righting it almost overzealously with a blush. The queue moved forward slowly, Ahri becoming lost in thought once more as it stilled.

Akali’s plate was pushed back across the table, past Evelynn, until it came to rest before her. Kai’Sa’s long arm retracted elegantly, her hand gesturing to the plate as if to show off her handywork. The sight of the cut-up food was rage inducing- childish and yet neat and orderly. The precise squares with golden egg atop was almost mocking; the way that the crusts were cut off were completely unnecessary.

Akali downed her juice, a hair’s breadth away from slamming the empty glass on the table. She refrained, but only _just._

“I need some air.” The words growled from her clenched teeth. She didn’t wait before standing up, her chair scraping against the polished wooden floors gratingly. With a defiant kiss to both their heads- her lips hard against their hair- she was out the door and fumbling with the packet of cigarettes in her pocket. She heard Kai’Sa’s worried, choked hum as she left. Confusion was rife on the dancer’s beautiful face.

Akali didn’t bother to turn around.

The world was blinding as she stepped into the sun. Her eyes squinted to slits as she sneezed with the sudden exposure. She cursed, hating that she was in the unlucky 35 percent as she sneezed again. The doorman offered her a handkerchief, his neat hair a golden brown in the sun’s glare. Akali waved him off, instead choosing to sculk further down the footpath and dart around the side of the building. 

The cold brick of the hotel grabbed the back of her jacket roughly as she leant against it. The decorative awning overhead was doing naught in shading her from the weak warmth of morning sun. She fiddled again with the cardboard box in her pocket, her fingers picking at the labelling before ultimately pulling her hand out her jacket and pushing her hair from her face.

Fuck smoking.

“I expected you to run away.”

Akali jumped, head whipping to face her intruder whilst trying to play off her shock. “You think so low of me?” Her fringe settled like a messy crown against her forehead.

Evelynn shook her head, her sunglasses firmly in place as she glided closer. Akali could make out the faint blurred outline of her form, nothing too noticeable unless you looked for it (and Akali was _always_ looking). “In contrast, I’m proud.”

Akali scoffed, rolling her eyes, and dropping her head back against the wall. “Hardy harr, there’s not really anything to be proud of, Eve. I snapped at Kai’Sa.”

Evelynn saddled up to her, leaning her shoulder against the wall and bracketing Akali away from the street. She cast a long shadow, blocking the sun of Akali’s eyes and letting the rogue get a proper look at her. “Nah uh,” a lathe hand snaked up and cupped the rapper’s jaw. Despite herself, Akali leant into the touch, turning her head to take in the demon. “Au contraire, you removed yourself from the situation without causing any chaos despite the absolute _agitation_ rolling off you.” A forked tongue licked naked lips, “you remained level-headed when you could have flown off the handle.” She leant in closer, golden eyes molten over her glasses. A fanged smile pulled wide, “fuck it’s hard to contain myself when you show such _control_.”

Akali raised an eyebrow, eyes darting between canines and hypnotic eyes. “Will you reward me for it?”

A pause.

“No.”

And like that, Evelynn pulled away, the space she occupied devoid and cold. The sun flooded when shadow receded, forcing Akali to squint at the sudden assault. She instinctively followed Evelynn, her body pulled along like a magnet before she caught herself in the act. Clearing her throat, Akali straightened her lapels with a blush, fingers playing with the fabric of her jacket awkwardly.

“Apologise to Bokkie. She can’t feel your emotions, but I can feel hers. She’s hurt.”

“Yes Ma’am.” She nodded, curt.

“Good girl.”

\--

“How long’s the trip?”

“Not long enough.”

“About 3 hours, according to the GPS.” Ahri chimed in, tapping away at her phone before showing the dancer. Kai’Sa didn’t bother to look, her eyes instead lingering on their youngest member. For lack of a better word, Akali looked defeated- rung out and stretched thin. Her eyes had bags underneath them, her posture was even more slouched than normal (which was already pretty bad) and no matter who spoke to her, all responses were gruff and brusque- preoccupied.

As if to prove the point, Akali slammed the boot shut, their luggage just fitting in the tightish space. Evelynn gave her a look, but she ignored it in favour of hopping into the back seat of the car. The door slammed shut and Evelynn looked ready to commit a crime.

The other two shot looks at each other over the car’s roof before slipping in themselves. Ahri chose to sit shotgun, her phone positioned towards Evelynn in the driver’s seat. That left Kai’Sa in the back with Akali, her tall looming figure large in the small space. Her head almost hit the roof, but she made it work by sitting lower in her seat.

Akali buddled herself up a little, pulling her soft hoodie across her chest and leaning into the door. Her eyes were glued out the window, but her mind was both a million kilometres away _and_ concerned with the woman next to her. Without further ado, Evelynn revved the engine and they shot off like a bat from hell.

\--

She stretched, pushing her arms as far as the small space would allow, popping her shoulders therapeutically. She cracked her knuckles next, then her wrists and finally her neck. With a sigh, Akali twisted in her seat to pop her spine and groaned when she couldn’t get the one spot she needed. God this car trip felt _long,_ and they weren’t even halfway through.

Ahri had fallen asleep thirty minutes into the ride, her tail in her lap like a blanket and her ears limp against her head. She’d never done well with waking up early- always taking any given opportunity to curl up and rest. Evelynn was holding Ahri’s phone in a lasher, the GPS on mute but perfectly in her field of vision. Akali looked over to her seat mate, eyebrows rising as she was met with a violet glare.

“What?” It came out with a little more bite then intended. She caught a flash of gold in the review mirror. She ignored it.

Kai’Sa gave her look, adjusting her posture and leaning over the middle seat towards the rapper. Akali couldn’t help but stare. Even if she was in a foul mood, there was no denying that the dancer was nothing short of stunning. Despite it, Akali leant back until her shoulder blades bumped the car door. The locks clicked on, Evelynn returning her hand to the steering wheel with flourish.

“You know I hate it when you do that.”

“Do what? This?” Akali cracked her wrist only to receive a light smack to her shoulder. The sound was sharp in the quiet car, sounding a lot more forceful than it actually was. She chuckled, causing Kai’Sa to lean in even closer and poke her in the ribs. Akali yelped, jumping from the sudden jab against her pressure point and groaning further at the elbow-rest digging into her back.

With a pout, she guarded her smarting ribcage with an elbow and returned Kai’Sa’s smack to her arm. Gasping in mock offence, Kai’Sa threw another jab at Akali’s solar plexus but the Maknae caught it mid thrust triumphantly.

“Hah! Not so fast Bokkie.” She broke into a grin, eyes alight with playful fire.

Like lightening, Kai’Sa dashed forward and planted a kiss right against her lips. Akali didn’t even have time to react before Kai’Sa was pulling away smugly, a thumb rubbing Akali’s lower lip slowly. “Not fast enough, ‘Kali.”

Kai’Sa was close- her body practically draped over the back seat and arms like support beams anchored to the plush cushions. Akali found herself pinned- exposed, vulnerable and completely undeserving.

She needed to apologise. But the way Kai’Sa’s eyes flashed purple with the flickering sun to the way dark brows sat heavy in waiting made the act of speaking extremely hard. She swallowed. None of that mattered, Kai’Sa was too important to her to not at least try.

“About earlier-” Akali made to get up, her body growing uncomfortable with the awkward position. Kai’Sa read it in her body language, easing back slightly and letting Akali breathe. It was as if they were connected by a taunt string- working perfectly in tandem as Kai’Sa sat back and Akali sat forward, stopping upright in sync. Akali scratched her nape, running a hand through her outgrown undercut- she needed to get it shaved again sometime- and sighed.

“I-” A false start, she groaned, swallowing against her dry throat. “Fuck it.” She looked at her girlfriend directly in the eyes, shoving her pride down and biting the bullet. “I’m sorry for my behaviour this morning, Kai’Sa. It was untoward and completely stupid for me to act like that especially when you were just trying to help.”

She looked down, picking at lint on her track pants. “I’ve been stuck in my head these past few days. It just feels like I’m a pot on the stove and the cook is slowly turning the heat higher and higher- like I’m about to boil at over any minute.”

“You don’t have to explain this to me, Akali.”

She winced at the earnest tone. Kai’Sa was always too good to her.

“No, I do. I need to take responsibility for hurting you.”

“Well then, thank you for taking onus. You are forgiven.”

She furrowed her grow, eyes squinting. “Surely it can’t be that easy. Let me make it up to you.”

Kai’Sa clicked her tongue. A large hand came up to cup Akali’s cheek, a soft thumb stroking near the corner of her eye. Akali let her head be directed, her gaze falling onto Kai’Sa’s easy smile. “It really is that easy, my Rogue. We’re partners, I _know_ you and I recognise your actions for what they are, just like how I know your apology is sincere.”

It was hard to just accept it; forgiveness wasn’t usually this easy obtain. The acceptance felt uncertain and caustic in her gut. Still, Akali nodded into the hand, placing a small kiss against the warm palm.

Kai’Sa always loved kisses to the palm- a simple act of devotion and respect, the gesture earnest and pure. That simple gesture, however, turned aggressive when Kai’Sa grabbed her jaw, pushing the smaller woman back roughly until Akali was, once again, pinned beneath her. She groaned with the sudden motion, eyes wild and enjoying it a little too much. Kai’Sa was restricted by her seat belt, but that didn’t stop the dancer from pulling Akali’s face to hers.

Their teeth knocked against each other, but Akali didn’t care. She was more concerned with the way Kai’Sa’s lips felt like warm pillows against her own and _how the fuck did her tongue move like that?_

“This is a rental.” A dry, bored tone cut the suddenly heavy air. Akali knew Evelynn well enough to hear the underlying excitement lacing the statement.

“What of it, Evie?” Akali quipped, lips kiss swollen and red, jaw aching in Kai’Sa strong grip. Kai’Sa huffed against her mouth, unhappy that she pulled away to answer the demon. Akali snaked a hand around to fist Kai’Sa’s high ponytail, pulling her head further back and exposing a long, elegant throat. Despite that, their eyes remained locked in a battle of wills. God, the way the light caught Kai’Sa’s cheek bones from this angle should be illegal.

A lasher coiled around her ankle, squeezing threateningly, “you know exact-”

“Shut it, Diva.” Kai’Sa cut, leaning forward again and harshly claiming Akali as hers. The whimper that escaped her throat was mortifying, but Akali really didn’t care for her tongue was already well acquainted with her girlfriend’s.

\--

“We’re here.”

Fuck. Fuck fucking fuckity _fuck_.

Right outside, through the thin glass of the window, sat a world Akali had left behind years ago. Forest surrounded them, the roads nothing more than dirt and gravel the further up into the mountains they drove. Evelynn had complained about it through fanged teeth, but it fell on deaf ears as all her companions were _preoccupied_.

Kai’Sa had done a wonderful job distracting her, her mind heady with unsated lust- but that feeling was quickly hardening in to weighted lead. It was suddenly very _very_ hot. Akali tugged at the collar of her hoodie, knowing better than to take it off and exposing her very much marked up chest and neck.

They were waiting at gigantic wooden doors that marked the entrance of the large property. The fence line was obscured by a thicket of trees, hiding the sheer size of the dojo behind tall walls and casting imposing shadows over the lone road where the car sat waiting.

Melancholy sat heavy on her chest, making a home in the marrow of her ribs and filling them with rot. It felt like she was decaying just being here, witnessing the season’s harsh changes on the landscape that she used to call home. The trees were mostly bare, nothing more than a mass of branches and thick trunks in all forms of grey. The undergrowth was a little more green, wild and menacing and calling out for her to _run_.

Had the forest always looked so decrepit? 

“Is there an intercom or something?” Evelynn asked turning around and pulling Akali from her thoughts. It had already been a solid minute.

Her question was answered by the low creaking of the gate slowly swinging open. It sounded grating- old and uncared for like it hadn’t been oiled since it was installed. Akali knew the sound well, it was the last thing she heard when she started her trek down the mountain and into her new life. The dojo never had many visitors, which was kind of the whole point of behind so secluded from the outside world. All the students lived on property, going home for Winter break and coming back with the thawing of Spring.

The demon turned back around, the leather of the steering wheel squeaking under her tightening grip. Akali’s anxiety grew with every passing second and in turn, the knuckles of Evelynn’s grip whitened. With each fraction the doors opened, Akali could see Ahri lean further and further forward. Her brows furrowing as her ears twitched with the loud sound. It got to a point when Kai’Sa gently wrapped her hands over Ahri’s ears, the velvet skin folding neatly under her palms as the fox sighed.

With a mighty boom, the doors stopped dramatically. The fence reverberating with the sheer weight of them. Akali spared a thought for their structural integrity.

They waited.

And waited.

Nothing was forthcoming. Just horrid, weighted silence until Akali couldn’t take it anymore and told Evelynn to “drive.” And drive they did, down a well-kept road bracketed by neat hedges and rolling lawns. It was like Winter didn’t exist here, like it had ceased at the gates and was too scared to take even one step further. Everything was lush- full of life and vibrate with colour and texture.

They passed ponds of koi with small bridges built over them. They saw rope courses and training equipment erected over plush grasses and sand. And the _buildings_ , god Akali hated them and their over-the-top ornate roofs and ancient doors. She knew these buildings, knew the feel of the roof tiles under bare feet, knew the best way to scale the walls and the safest spots to hide in a game of tag. She’d run these halls from birth and slid on the wooden floors, fallen into the pods and scraped her knees in the Zen Garden.

Akali was a child of this dojo.

_Was._

“When you said ‘Dojo,’ my thoughts were more along the lines of a single building.” Evelynn whispered, her voice soft; talking any louder felt wrong. They pulled up to the main building, the opulence of the place was shouted in every crevice of the woodwork.

“This is an estate.” Kai’Sa said, her eyes darting between all the car windows, even going as far as turning around to look back down at the road they came from. “Where is everyone?”

“Winter break.” Akali opened her door- no point putting off the inevitable. Before she could step out, however, she was halted by a hand to her wrist. Her jaw clenched, she refused to turn around- too scared to lose her nerve.

“I just want you to know that no matter what, we’re here for you Akali.”

“I know.” A pause. She gritted her teeth and steeled her spine. Turning back, she looked at each one of them in turn, “I love you all.” The worlds felt forceful and strong as they filled the space. They were true. She needed them to know that she was serious, that the three individuals in this car were her very world.

“We love you too.”

The admission was the boost she needed.

She swung her foot out, the gravel beneath crunching under her high-tops as the cold mountain air bit her cheeks. Kai’Sa slid through the backseat, choosing to come out the same door and pulled the shorter woman into a back embrace. Akali didn’t know she had been trembling until then, her body stilling as lithe arms wrapped around her waist.

It didn’t last long before all their attention was drawn to the front doors. They opened to reveal a tall, muscled figure. Akali detangled herself from her girlfriend, taking a step forward and falling into a deep bow.

“Konnichiwa, Shen-sensei.”

“Welcome home, my pupil.”

Akali would dispute all evidence that her eyes had misted at the sound of his voice.

\--

They took tea in the outdoor patio, the packed earth adorned with throw pillows and low set tables that were home to various cakes and biscuits. Ahri couldn’t help herself, taking another shortbread biscuit from the platter before finishing the one already in her hand. Her ears and tail were once again hidden, vanished beneath glamour and hat. Evelynn gave her a look over the rim of her yunomi whilst Kai’Sa held her cup in her own palms, letting the warm seep into her cold fingers.

Akali caught it all whilst sipping from her own cup, taking in how surreal it was to have her two worlds colliding like this. They all seemed out of place yet completely at home, sitting seiza and drinking their tea with two palms. Grace and elegance befell them, surround by hanging plants growing from the awnings and weeping out of gutters. Birds sung happily from their roosts, the aviary just peeping out from the above the building walls surrounding them.

The patio was one of the many internal gardens the main building had, often used as a place of study and relaxation for the students between their classes. A massive tree sat in the middle; its roots so entrenched in the earth it was part of the very foundations of the building itself.

She smiled, looking up at the branches and remembering all the stupid shit she used to do. The ground had retained the warmth of the morning sun, the heat slowly seeping into Akali through her crossed feet and the cup in her palms.

Master Shen broke the silence, a light hum in his deep baritone. It was a voice of calm and reason, one Akali instantly associated with safety.

“I remember when you feel from those very branches, breaking your arm in three separate places.” He took a sip, he’s warm eyes crinkled at the corners.

Master Shen was handsome for an older man. His salt and pepper hair suited his weathered face much better than the jet black of his youth. He sat like the calm in a tempest, dormant but purposeful in constraining the chaos around him. He’s square shoulders looked capable of holding the world, his hands mishappen from multiple fractures and the harsh conditioning of training. Akali’s own hands looked much the same, the scares of a past of violent never really faded.

She huffed a laugh, watching her tea dance from the movement, “I was seven, Sensei. I slipped whilst trying to get my kite.”

“You were rebellious even in your youth. I’m certain that kite was contraband.”

“Contraband?” Ahri piped up, eyes darting between the tall tree and Akali. If her tail was out, Akali was sure it would be wagging.

“Yeah. Anything fun wasn’t allowed.”

“Come now, that’s not true Tethi-san. You were allowed cards.”

“My point exactly.”

They both shared a laugh, the tension breaking like a wave on a cliff’s side. The three others looked confused so Akali decided to clarify. “It was Sensei that gave me the kite as a birthday present. He was my supplier.”

“I wouldn’t put it like that, I gave you toys and magazines. It was our little secret, until you fell that is.”

The energy of the group was instantly different. Kai’Sa’s shoulders relaxed, her second skin- hidden beneath her jacket- hummed with the upswing in mood. Ahri shoved another biscuit into her mouth, her hat slightly twitching with the way her ears perked up. For Evelynn there was no noticeable change, but the air of murder definitely lifted a little.

“I used to get into all sorts of trouble and Sensei often facilitated it.” Akali gestured flippantly, eyes looking into middle ground as her mind spun through the rolodex of memories. Her smile grew wider with each one, the memories of all the stupid injuries of childhood and all the tomfoolery she inspired in her classmates made her chest feel warm.

“How is everyone? Has Kennen finally received his title?”

Master Shen nodded, “he did. I’m very proud of him, even if his boundless energy is something to be feared.”

“He never knows how to sit still. That got me caught once or twice.”

“I also believe that was because you didn’t know how to avoid the loose roof tiles.”

“I swear it was always a different tile that was loose. Roof tiles shouldn’t be loose in the first place!”

“It was a calculated decision.”

Silence descended like a flock of crows on a battlefield, swift and gruesome. Akali’s body became an iron cage, her posture suddenly stiffening with the unwelcome intrusion. It was like all the air had been sucked forcibly from her lungs, leaving her winded and her brain short circuiting.

Still her body moved on reflex. She pivoted quickly; tea forgotten on the floor as her body folded in half until her head hit the ground. She bowed as deeply as possible; her eyes still wide open with a terror so profound it boarded on respect. Even then it felt like she needed to get lower, to meld herself with the dirt now sticking to her sweating forehead.

Akali didn’t hear the way the others shifted around her. Master Shen stood from his cushion, nodding his head at the new arrival. Evelynn didn’t even bother to look over, more preoccupied with the biscuit in her hand that the person in the doorway. Kai’Sa, sweet _sweet_ Kai’Sa, stood up abruptly, her body coiled and ready to explode if it wasn’t for Ahri’s hand against her calf. They had promised to support Akali, so it was only on the rapper’s word would they act. That didn’t mean they had to like it.

“Okaasan konnichwa.”

“Shen-san, why did you not notify me of our visitors. Have the rooms been prepared?”

Master Shen nodded. Akali remained bowed. She knew better than to rise without permission. “Hai. Their bags have been moved to the guest house, all the futons have been dusted and everything is in order.”

Leave it to her mother to ruin a joyous moment. It was like she had a radar that told her where people were having fun so she could come and smite it.

“Good. I expect you all for dinner. Dismissed.”

With that, she left. Her footsteps were silent as she continued down the hallway as if it was any other day. Akali forced air out her nose, body slumping as her stiff shoulders collapsed. She took a moment- it had gone… better than expect. Sure Okaasan didn’t acknowledge her, but it was much preferred than being degraded in front of her girlfriends.

She only rose when a soft palm smoothed over her shoulder. Sitting up, she brought a hand up to grab it. Evelynn gave her a sullen smile, eyes too heavy for Akali’s liking. Ahri hummed, the noise causing Akali to look over and notice that her hand was still on Kai’Sa’s calf. Ahri’s free hand came up and gently brushed Akali’s forehead, dislodging the red earth marking her skin and correcting her fringe.

“I’ll show you to your rooms. Dinner is the usual time, Tethi-san.”

All she could do was nod.

\--

It was a small solace that Akali still knew the floorboards under her feet. She walked silently, avoiding all the musical planks as they strolled down the roofed path to the guest house. The rest of the band was not as lucky. Evelynn and Kai’Sa were light footed enough to not make a lot of noise when walking, but Ahri was surprisingly flat footed- that, or she was doing it on purpose in some sort of soft, squeaky rebellion. (Akali had a feeling it was the latter).

The guest house was a one storey building In a traditional Japanese style- much like the rest of the estate. It stood slightly raised off the ground, it’s walls accented with dark wooden beams and it was home to a copious number of sliding doors. In all the time Akali had lived here, she had only seen the building used three times and each one of those times was for people of significance.

Despite the lack of use over the years, the building was still as pristine as the rest of the estate. Its classical roof was freshly cleaned and lacquered, making the mythical motifs gleam with golden brilliance in polished shine.

Master Shen led them inside, slipping off his shoes before stepping onto the tatami mats. The house opened into a common space, the room lightly furnished with a table and pillows and a small kitchen. Branching off was a short hallway that lead to the four rooms- two each side- and ended with a full bathroom. Whilst quaint, everything in it gave off an air of quality. Solid woods, fine joinery and busy motifs littered all the furniture, keeping the eyes busy as they took in all the details.

Master Shen left with a bow, letting the women settle in and freshen up. Ahri was the first to venture forth, her tail unfolding into existence as she took off her beanie to reveal her satelliting ears. Kai’Sa was quick to follow, side stepping into the kitchen to find a stocked fridge and various cupboards filled with fine dinnerware.

Evelynn stayed beside her. They we’re similar heights, only a centimetre difference between them without shoes, but Akali had never felt so small. Her mind was still processing all that had just transpired and the way her heart ached told her that she wasn’t _okay._

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Her wry smile spoke volumes. Looking at her lover, she shook her head. If she talked now, she probably wouldn’t make it to dinner and that would be the herald of all sorts of bad news. Instead, she chose to grab Evelynn’s hand tightly, pulling her into the kitchen to then also grab Kai’Sa’s hand before dragging them both to find Ahri in one of the end rooms.

She needed her girls close. She just wanted to be fucking _held,_ was that too much to ask?

Ahri was making herself at home amongst the spartan room. A futon was already unrolled on the floor, a pillow haphazardly thrown atop as the fox woman looked through various draws. She didn’t find much- an old comb, some note paper and a pen, and a various assortment of lint and dust bunnies.

The sight of the dirt made Akali’s shoulders droop; her eyes heavy with understanding. Evelynn shifted beside her, her tongue subtly darting out like a snake scenting the air. Akali felt three solid taps against the back of her hand, the gesture helping to settle her a little.

“Are you done snooping, gumiho?”

Ahri spun on spot, her ears perked and smile cheeky, “is it snooping if the room is ours? I’m just familiarising myself with my surroundings, Eve.” She clasped her hands behind her back- the picture of perfect innocence.

The smile faltered when Ahri took in how small Akali looked. Her hands dropped, her feet sure as she closed the distance between them and essentially caged the rapper right there in the doorway. Akali was surrounded- the sudden closeness making her muscles stiff and her mind cagey. She didn’t have a chance to voice her thoughts, however, before a pair of arms snaked between her own and pulled her forward.

Like a puzzle piece, she fit neatly against Ahri’s shoulder, the much older woman running a soothing hand over the hard plane of Akali’s back. Akali acted on instinct, her arms pulling Ahri closer and hands burying themselves in the singer’s coat. Evelynn pressed up behind her, sandwiching Ahri’s hand between her and Akali. Evelynn took the opportunity to run her hands through Akali’s hair, undoing her ponytail and shifting through the matted mess.

Kai’Sa placed a lingering kiss against what little of Akali she could access, her lips befalling a frowning forehead and smoothing out the wrinkles. Her accented voice cut the quiet like honey, lips smooth against her skin, “should I make us some tea?”

Evelynn was the one to respond, Akali feeling the vibrations of the words against her back. “That would be lovely, Kai’Sa dear.” A pause, Akali could practically hear the grin in her next sentence, “or should I say _Deer_?”

Evelynn’s snort was so unladylike that is pulled a surprised chuckle from Akali’s mouth. The sound was so happy and sudden it sent all of them into a fit of stupid, tired laughter. They broke up, Akali feeling a little more centred as she went to flop on the futon.

“You’re insufferable.”

“I aim to please.” Evelynn bowed dramatically, her form dematerialising with flare as Kai’Sa left to put the kettle on.

Akali watched it all, her hands folded on her stomach as she lay on her back. The futon was bathed in a patch of sunlight, the window above showing a peek of Winter sky framed by the branches of a bare tree. Ahri settled quietly beside her, her body curling into Akali’s side as a bushy foxtail draped across her lap. A cold nose nuzzled against her cheek. Akali groaned, jerking away and blowing warm air into a fox ear, earning a growl and a glare from deep amber eyes.

“You _really_ love doing that.” Ahri grouched, her pout too adorable to even compute. Akali did her best anyway.

“Can you blame me? You make the cutest faces.”

“Oh? Do I?”

“Yes, exceedingly adorable.” She nodded solemnly, as if discussing some grave secret.

Ahri nuzzled closer, humming as she hid her blush. “Sometimes, you’re too much.”

“That just means there’s more of me to love you.”

“True dat.”

“Wow, no romantic line in return? I really need to limit your internet usage.”

They chuckled, chests swelling with the easy atmosphere that had creeped in, replacing the tenseness of earlier like a balm on a burn. Ahri was gifted like that, able to change the mood at the drop of a hat and the swish of a tail (or nine). It made her a good leader, changing situations to her favour and guiding people to achieve their best selves.

Still, despite the ability to breath easier, Akali still felt unease sit under her skin like a poison. She couldn’t help it, just being here was dragging up all sorts of memories she had stored away in a small box at the back of her mind. Maybe it was time to pry that lid open, even if it was just a little.

“I’m surprised Okaasan didn’t make me stay in my room. She used to love alienating me so I would focus on my studies. Not that it worked all that well.”

Ahri shifted, propping herself up on her elbows. Her ears stood tall as she paid rapt attention. Akali looked at her with a warm smile, cheeks making her eyes crinkle at the corners. She brought a hand up to stroke at the soft, fuzzy cheek of her Unnie. “Tell me about your childhood, please?” the question was sincere, floating through sharp canines and lolling over a pink tongue.

“It’s not that interesting, Ahri-chan.” Akali dismissed, patting the cheek softly and earning a playful nip to her finger.

“Nonsense. Anything that pertains to you is interesting by default.”

“Oh hardly.”

A harder nip, the tip of a fang breaking the topmost layer of skin. Akali’s eyes widened, a brow raised. “Let me be the judge of what I find interesting, Maknae.”

Akali nodded, properly chastised. Dropping her hand back onto the futon, she took in a deep breath of tatami scented air. The dust came along with it- she hid her frown. It was a subtle way for her mother to show that she really wasn’t welcome here anymore.

“What can I say? I was the typical rebellious kid- staying up late, wreaking havoc on my peers and picking fights with people two sizes too big for me.” She waved into the open air, Ahri’s eyes watching her hand like a cat.

“Did you go to school?” A second tail thumped into existence, curling across Akali like the first.

“Technically yes. The Dojo is also a boarding school, hence the dorms and various buildings. Tutors stay here during the school semesters and teach all the students. It’s a pretty good education, if I’m being honest. Fukuda-sensei was able to teach me calculus, so I count that as a pass.”

“The limit does not exist.”

“Don’t make me hit you.” Akali groaned, rolling her eyes. “And no, we did not wear pink on Wednesdays, don’t even ask.”

“You’re no fun.”

“Excuse you, I am _all_ the fun.” Akali stuck out her tongue, “you wanna hear about the time I accidentally burnt down the garden shed?”

“O, are we sharing stories?”

They both looked over to see Kai’Sa in the doorway holding two cups of steaming tea. Evelynn stood behind her with her own mug- the rim already stained purple with her lipstick- and another mug on the end of a lasher. Ahri grabbed it when it was close enough, shivering at the warmth bleeding into her palms. Akali pulled her closer, depositing a kiss to her rouged cheek and a peck to smiling lips.

“Yeah, I am.” She turned back to the others, gesturing them over and patting the floor invitingly. “I think it’s about time I opened up about some things.”

\--

“So yeah, I was halfway through a bottle of Jack when Kennen rushed into my room and hid in my closet. I was so confused but apparently he’d stolen a full chicken from the kitchens and the cook found out.”

“What a greedy little bastard.” Evelynn commented, her head resting on Akali’s stomach. It bounced a little when Akali chuckled.

“You’re telling me. Like sure Kennen burns through a lot of energy by always moving so fast, but he was a real greedy boi too. He always ate my snacks without remorse.”

“Even I don’t do that, and I’m eating for two.”

“That makes you sound like you’re pregnant, Bokkie.” Ahri dead panned, opening one eye and looking at the dancer laying on the floor above them.

Kai’Sa snorted, “That’d surely be something.”

Akali’s eyes lit up, “Holy shit can you imagine a little Kai’Sa running around? Oh! Better yet, _dancing_ around? I’d lose my goddamn mind. Totally bags being the cool aunt.”

“Aunt?” Evelynn lifted her head, confusing marring her face.

“Oh honey, you’d be their mother.” Kai’Sa laughed, rolling over and placing a sweet kiss against her head.

Akali there abouts combusted.

\--

“Hang on a second, you cut a chain with your bare _hand._ ” Kai’Sa exclaimed in awe, her partially chewed biscuit pocketed in the side of her mouth.

“ _Please_ don’t speak with you mouth full Bokkie, you know I hate it.”

“You don’t seem to have that problem when I’m gagging on your strap.”

“ _Holy fuck_ ,” Akali blushed like a wildfire, “you can’t just say things like that.”

“Why not? It’s not like it’s a lie.”

“Don’t call me out like this.”

\--

“There’s someone inhuman at our door.” Ahri said, breaking Akali midstory and drawing everyone’s attention. As if on cue, there was a series of heavy knocks resounding in a practised patten.

Akali knew that rhythm anywhere. Like a dog that heard the dinner bell, she detangled herself from the cuddle pile, kicking over an empty mug in the process, and dashed like lightning down the hallway. Ignoring the shouts of her girlfriends, she yanked the door open with so much gusto it was a wonder that it didn’t come off its hinges.

“Kennen!” The name burst forth, pure elation making it high pitched and free.

“’Kali! I can’t believe you’re back!”

The small body catapulted into her chest like a cement cannon ball, tipping her over and making her fall flat on her arse. The erupted into a fit of raucous laughter, Akali literally holding the small body in her arms like a large baby.

Ahri, Evelynn and Kai’Sa stood dumbstruck at the scene, various stages of confusion written across their faces. Akali didn’t care, she was more preoccupied with her childhood friend she hadn’t seen in years after all. She set him down on the floor, flipping into a squat and running her mouth like a motor.

“Bruh, I’m so proud of you! You got your title, _‘Heart of the Tempest’_! That’s so badass.”

“Says you!” Kennen waved off, his body in a constant state of motion. “You’ve achieved your dream and are literally make music of a living. I’m so proud of _you_.”

Before it could go any further, Evelynn cleared her throat. Akali came back to herself, realising where she was and how rude she was acting. Kennen spun to face his audience, blue eyes widening and his furry, brown, face slackening with shock. If Akali didn’t know him any better, she would have believed his little display.

“Sorry guys.” She gave a sheepish shrug, rubbing the back of her neck. Pointing to Kennen, she stated the obvious. “This is Kennen, Heart of the Tempest and my oldest friend who should get a phone sometime so we can keep in contact.”

Kennen huffed a laugh, rolling his eyes good naturedly. Kai’Sa chuckled too, earning a wink from the tiny ninja.

Akali felt pride at the gesture, feeling herself relax a little. Turning to Kennen, she gestured to each one of her band mates in turn. “Kennen, these are my bandmates and the members of K/DA: Ahri,” Ahri waved, her tails gone and ears hidden under her hair, “Evelynn,” Evelynn just nodded, a flash to her golden eyes, “and Kai’Sa.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” The accented English was charming, instantly putting Kennen at ease.

“The pleasure is all mine!” Kenned clapped his hands, turning to his friend and corking her shoulder with a light punch. Akali gasped, surprised, and rubbed the smarting spot with a pout. What was it with people smacking her today?

“What was that for?”

“ _Bandmates._ Really? More like _mate_ mates, you all positively reek of each other. I can’t believe you would dishonour them like that by introducing them as _bandmates_. Geez.”

“Oi!” Akali flicked him back, feeling a zap of electricity travel up her arm. “It’s not a lie! They’re my band mates too, we just all happen to share a bed sometimes and affection all the time.”

“A half truth still counts as a lie.” He said sagely before turning back to the others. He bowed, his ears flicking atop his head. “I’m sorry for my friend’s blatant disrespect, I thought I had trained her better than that but apparently not.”

“Oh,” Evelynn strode forward, crouching down and extending a hand. Kennen took it with a firm grip. “I just know I’m going to like you.” She crooned, showing off her pearly whites with a predatory grin. “Now, what’s a Yordle doing in the human realm? I thought your kind preferred the timelessness of Bandle City.”

“Most do, but it gets to a point when eternally golden sunshine can get a bit boring.” He quipped, letting go of Evelynn’s hand and moving onto the others. Once done, he took a step back, nodding his head happily. “Of course you’re this extra, Li. Leave it to you to find life mates with a gumiho, succubus and… a void touched?”

Kai’Sa nodded at the question, her second skin taking the opportunity to coalesce into its pod form with a hum. Ahri’s ears flicked up and Evelynn’s lashes draped behind her, shifting in an unfelt wind.

“What can I say, Kennen, I attract excellent company.”

“And I would expect nothing less. You are friends with me, after all” He smiled, chest puffing proudly. It only lasted a short while, before his shoulders dropping a little. Akali took the chance to take a good look at him.

Kennen was tall by Yordle standards, which was to say he was extremely short by everyone else’s. If she was to stand, the tips of his fluffy ears would come to rest just above her kneecaps. He looked healthier than the last time she had seen him, his brown, curly fur lustrous in the dying light and his electric blue eyes deep with knowledge. Electricity danced occasionally between his fingertips, arcing like a ladder between his thumb and his forefinger.

Normally his body would be in a constant state of motion, his boundless energy infectious to anyone that interacted with him. Now, however, he stood still. Akali found the very sight terrifying.

“It’s time.”

Her heart fell. She wanted to put it off just a little longer.

“I hate to be a harbinger of bad news, but your mother awaits.”

She gulped.

\--

They had all changed into neat clothes in a bid to look semi presentable- or at least that’s what Akali tried to do. The others looked flawless in anything, but Akali knew that no matter what she wore it was going to be picked apart regardless. Still, that didn’t stop her from doing up the top button on her collared shirt and recentering her tie. Kai’Sa straightened the lapels of Akali’s dinner jacket, brushing off imaginary lint and placing a kiss to her forehead. Akali’s eyes closed at the gesture, savouring the calm before the storm.

“Why does it feel like we’re about to have dinner with a mob boss?” Ahri mused, played with the collar of her blouse. An ear flicked as she readjusted her fringe, patting down imaginary flyaways.

Akali smiled, her chest constricting like an ill-fitting binder. They’d be loitering at the dining hall’s door for a solid minute. It was just the four of them. Kennen had escorted them there and then left with a strong hug and a reassuring pat to her shin. Akali knew it was meant to impart some sort of strength, she just wished it actually worked.

“Okay that silence doesn’t reassure me.” Ahri deadpanned at the lack of response, her single tail limp behind her. They’d all decided it was best to take their preferred forms- there was no point hiding it. If her mother had a problem then she’d just have to bite her tongue or take it up with her daughter.

Akali shrugged, taking a step up the decorative stairs and placing a hand against the warn wooden door. “Don’t worry about all that. We’re just going to have a nice dinner- just eat some food, drink some drinks and then go to bed.” She didn’t believe a word of it, but the sentiment was nice. Too bad Ahri didn’t buy it.

“Should we get this over with?” Evelynn piped up, placing a hand over Akali’s own. Her palm was like a furnace, the warmth all-encompassing as she applied a little pressure. Still, it was Akali that opened the door- Evelynn wouldn’t take that choice away from her.

Unlike that of the entrance gates, the hinges here were definitely oiled. The heavy doors swung open without a sound, revealing a scene that looked like it was straight out of a movie. Warm light pooled from the large, spacious hall. Rows upon rows of tables stood vacant in neat lines over a tiled floor- ready and waiting for their students to return. The wooden tabletops were glossed to a reflective shine, blooming with light from the overhead fixtures.

None of this was of interest to Akali, she’d seen all this before. She knew the way the floor remained solid under her light feet. She knew the cross winds that would run through the hall in the early afternoon (now stagnant with the windows closed against the winter night). She _knew_ the very breath of this building- the way the wood groaned with the changing temperatures, the feel of a mop in her hand as she polished the floors as punishment, the way the water would pool in small puddles in the worn terracotta. This building, this _place_ , was as much her as the very flesh of her being.

They all entered the hall in a line, heads high and their shoes clacking against the floor. On instinct Akali looked to her right towards the raised dais. She knew what to expect and yet here she was still surprised.

There, like royalty, sat her mother and father.

They lorded over the empty space, eyes dark and stormy as they watched their guests approach. Akali didn’t miss the way their gaze lingered on the more _monstrous_ parts of her companions, brows almost imperceptivity frowning at the blindside. Her father- all height and broad shoulders- wasn’t as successful at hiding his ire as her mother was. Brushing it off, Akali led the charge, feeling like a war torn general facing her death and knowing it.

They came to the edge of the raised platform, the tips of her formal shoes kissing the first of two stairs that separated the levels. She slipped them off smoothly, her black socks quickly leeching up the cold of the tiles. Her girlfriends followed suit- each toeing off their shoes without complaint and following her lead.

Squaring her shoulders, Akali held her head heigh and stepped up.

“I see that you have forgotten the meaning of respect.”

The words weren’t loud, but they may as well have been shouted in the pin drop silence of the hall. Kai’Sa’s shoulder pods rippled, but none of them moved. Akali swallowed, coming to standstill at a vacant chair. She waited for the others to choose a seat before pulling hers out and sitting at the table.

It was strange the way her parents had chosen to lay the table. The two of them took up one whole side, leave the other four to sit opposite them as if at a group interview. Between them sat an assortment of dishes that looked absolutely delicious. Okaasan may have been a horrid mother, but she sure knew how to cook. 

“Respect needs to be earned, Otousan.” Akali looked him dead in the eye, holding her breath as she watched his jaw clench.

The lines were drawn. Before her father could retort, her mother cut in with a subtle hand to his knee. “Let us eat first. I would like to know more about your-” she eyed Evelynn and Kai’Sa wearily and downright glared at Ahri, “-partners.”

This, this was something she could do. As the youngest of the party, she grabbed the bottle of chilled sake next to her and filled everyone’s sake cups. Maybe this would be more bearable if she was a little tipsy. Without a cheers, they all drank from their cups deeply, the tension mellowing a little with the shared drink. Akali poured some more for each of them. She wasted no time sipping from hers before grabbing her chopsticks and attacking the buri daikon.

Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad?

\--

Akali looked her parents as they ate in silence. The past few years hadn’t changed them that much. Her mother, Mayym, looked a little smaller, her face more pulled and her eyebrows thinner. Her short frame was elegantly wrapped in a simple kimono- the long sleeves rolled once to keep them clean and away from all the food. The now shortened fabric revealed a flash of wrist with every movement- showing off the paintings of Mayym’s skin whenever she reached for a platter across the table. Kai’Sa paused briefly when she saw how densely tattooed Akali’s mother was, the ink thick and detailed- greening with age.

Akali’s father, Botan, sat ramrod straight. He was more broad than tall but no less imposing. His clean-cut jaw cast long shadows down his neck, the skin soft with no sign of stubble to be seen. The scar that ran from the bridge of his nose to the bottom of his right cheek had faded slightly, whiter than the salmon pink it had been when Akali left. His powder blue yukata gaped a little at the front, the linen material comfortable around his hulking body and allowing him a free range of movement at all times.

Kai’Sa looked at her when she saw the black panelling of tattoos twisting around his chest. Akali was about to answer the silent question but was cut off before she could.

“I do not approve of the company you keep.”

Akali looked away from the dancer, stopping midchew and frowning. She didn’t bother to swallow before speaking, the food in her mouth making the words a little muffled. “The company I keep?”

“Don’t play dumb with me, Akali. There are three demons at my table when I would much prefer there to be none.”

Akali swallowed, sitting back and crossing her arms. “Two demons and a void touched.”

Her tie bunched and her collar felt a little tight around her throat, but her form looked more imposing with her already broad shoulders accentuated by the shoulder pads of her jacket. A lasher slithered up her chair leg. Evelynn, who sat to her left, leaned in towards her.

“We’re a package deal.” The siren’s voice was smooth, charming and slightly rough with calculated disuse.

“Wherever Akali goes, we follow.” Ahri nodded along, placing her elbows on the table and leaning forward disrespectfully. Her ears were angled backwards. Kai’Sa hummed, a warm hand coming to rest on Akali’s right knee.

She felt mighty then- indestructible and bolstered beyond compare.

“You know kitsune are forbidden from this estate and yet here we are.”

“Good thing there are no kitsune here, Okkasan.” She jabbed, arms still firmly crossed. Her had pointedly placed her chopsticks facing towards her mother.

Mayym took a calm bite of food, chewing it slowly without breaking eye contact. Akali kept the gaze steady, her own blue eyes boring into her mother’s black. They stayed locked in a battle of wills while everyone else sat in rife silence. Mayym swallowed, not expecting Akali to keep up the game for so long. A bitter smile pulled at her lips; black eyes forced to look away as Mayym blinked.

The silent victory was short lived.

Mayym looked over to Evelynn, making a face at her revealing outfit as she gave her a once over. The diva had decided to wear a long-sleeved blouse much too sheer for the cold weather. Her waist was cinched by the tight leather of her pants, the material hugging all her curves and reminding Akali that Evelynn was definitely not wearing underwear. More than the appropriate number of buttons were undone, revealing a generous cleavage that Evelynn accentuated by draping an arm over Akali’s shoulders.

Akali watched her parent’s reaction to the possessive gesture, taking perverse pleasure at they way their eyes darted between them. Surely, they would put two and two together by the end of the night. 

“And what about you?” Botan gruffed, his voice gravelly and black eyes beady under bushy brows. He pointed his chopsticks at the demon, a grain of rice sticking to the end. Akali balked at the gesture. She never remembered her father as being this rude.

“I see you’ve forgotten the meaning of respect, Otousan.” Akali bit, her brow so low she could see her eyebrows. She glared at the chopsticks wanting nothing more then to bat them away. She gripped her biceps instead, not wanting to make a scene.

“The slut hasn’t _earnt_ my respect, as you so eloquently put it.”

Oh fuck no.

Akali exploded. She stood up with such vigour her chair upturned behind her. Slamming her hands on the table, the plates rattled with the bang. “Take that _back_.” She didn’t shout. Her voice turned pure murder, the intent clear to all.

“Only if she covers up.”

A lasher coiled around her waist, holding Akali back before she could launch herself over the table and commit first degree murder. Evelynn stood up beside her, a cheeky smile lighting up her features as her golden eyes flashed. She brought up a hand before her, making sure she had everyone’s attention before letting the flesh fade into shadows. From the writhing mass of smoke extended five very sharp, very long pink talons.

Akali chuckled darkly, loving the flicker of surprise on her father’s face as he leaned back slightly. Mayym didn’t change expression, but her hold on her chopsticks turned tense.

“The last time a man asked me to cover up, I flayed him alive and wore his skin. He made a beautiful leather coat- such an _interesting_ colour.” She picked up her sake cup, finishing off the drink before sitting back down. A lasher rightened Akali’s seat, the other subtly tugging at Akali’s waist and urging her to sit back down. She did. “I wonder how well tattoo’s cure?”

“Is that a threat?”

“Only a musing.” Evelynn smiled, retracting her claws, pouring herself a new glass of sake.

Evelynn hadn’t even placed the bottle back down when Mayym stood up elegantly. She unrolled her sleeves- brushing away creases in her skirt and folding her hands in front of her before she addressed the table. “I think we are done here. The ceremony will take place tomorrow morning at dawn. You’re dismissed.”

What?

“That’s it?” Akali asked, her mouth pulling. “You call me here and don’t look at me in the courtyard, then you scrutinise my companions and _then_ you dismiss us without a care?” Akali counted on her fingers. “I can read the signs, Okkasan, you don’t want me here, so why summon me? Just hand over my title, I don’t even need to be here.”

Mayym looked down her nose, dark eyes steeling with silent anger. Oh she _hated_ to be questioned. “The only reason _you_ are here is because we need the family heirloom and I don’t trust the postage system to deliver it safely.”

“You called me here over fucking _kunai?_ ” Akali stood again, the chair not flipping this time. “Surely you could have gotten one of your minions to come and pick them up?” A pause, Akali’s face slackened, her eyes widening. Surely _not._ “Or maybe you just wanted to see your daughter one more time.”

The scoff that proceeded shouldn’t have hurt as much as it did. The simple exhale of air felt like an arrow through her heart, cutting her aorta and making her bleed all over the floor. It was a long shot by any standard, but still a part of Akali did hope for at least a little bit of family affection.

“You are no daughter of mine.”

Kai’Sa rose, her body tall enough to rival Akali’s father.

“You’re lucky to have kept your hands, _traitor.”_

Kai’Sa punched Akali’s mother across the face.

_Shit._

The woman’s head snapped to the side, the hit completely blindsiding her. Botan jumped into action, shoving the table out the way and into Akali’s stomach. His large meaty hands made to grab and pull Kai’Sa into a choke hold.

And, like that, the dining hall descended into anarchy.

The food was shoved to the floor and sake was split as Akali tried to get around the stupid fucking table. She vaulted over and grabbed her father’s sleeve- pulling his aim off as Kai’Sa ducked- and hit him open palm in the underside of his jaw. He steeled his neck, grabbing Akali by the scruff and yanking her back.

Akali caught her footing, throwing a straight jab towards her father’s sternum and making contact solidly. Botan groaned, bringing his knee up and forcibly connecting with his daughter’s side. Akali pushed back against the force of the blow, negating it as adrenalin flooded her body.

Ahri dashed forward, all her tails unfurling like a fur shield as she got between the two- catching Botan’s fist and shoving him backwards before he could take Akali’s head clean off. Evelynn wisped into demon shade in a split second, her black smoke wrapping around Mayym before she could regain her bearings and join the fray.

“Ahri we need to erase some memories.” The demon’s voice sounded like an echo in a cave- foreboding and forbidden. Her arm’s pulled Mayym into a bind, forcing the woman to stand still lest the lasher at her throat carved her like a pig.

Ahri hissed at the idea, shoving the large man to the floor and pinning his hands to his side as he writhed. Botan roared at his inability to buck Ahri off, not understanding that the gumiho was far stronger than what her frame suggested. Akali held his legs still, her mind going a mile a minute as she tried to make sense of what just happened.

“Do I _have_ to?” Ahri gritted, ears plastered to her skull. She detested the idea dearly.

“I don’t think we have a choice.” Akali muttered, eyes wide as she looked between them. Her mind was so loud that it was hard to _think_. “Fuck me, Kai’Sa I can’t believe you fucking punched my _mother.”_

Kai’Sa didn’t get time to retort before her attention was stolen by the sudden intrusion of blue light filling the room. The once warmly light hall was cast into sharp relief, everything bathed in various shades of cyan and cobalt. Akali looked over at the source, confusion heavy on her brow. That confusion evaporated at the sight of Ahri’s hunched form.

The gumiho sat completely still, her body like the centre point of a vortex. The air around them rushed in a lazy fashion, as if the oxygen itself had forgotton physics and only had an idea of how it was meant to behave. Everyone stilled at the presence of power, their features drowned in the high contrast of supernatural light. The room turned hot- stifling as it suddenly became harder to breathe.

Ahri looked more fox-like. Her nose elongated, her features pulled, and her teeth more predatory than human. The most noticeable change, however, was the blue ball of light that sat innocently on her tongue.

The mass of light rotated in on itself in blinding glory- almost as if a mighty being had contained the raging ocean into a ball the size of a marble. Ahri’s long canines sat like a cage around it, the bone turning translucent with the intensity of the light.

Akali couldn’t look away- like a moth to the flame she was mesmerised despite the way her pupils burned. All thoughts left her, her body slackening the longer she looked. It was like her very person solely existed to gaze upon this light, she knew of nothing before this very moment, and she wanted to know nothing after it as well.

She watched Ahri lean in, her jaw unhinging like a bear trap and her tongue unfolding slowly as she inched closer and closer to Botan’s face. Botan looked just as mesmerised, his body completely limp as he watched his impending doom.

A lasher quickly blindfolded her, wrapping around her eyes and tilting Akali’s head back. “No human should see this.” Evelynn’s voice echoed in her skull, the deep timbre vibrating in her bones. She wanted to thrash, to rid herself of this cage so she could gaze upon the light once more, but the sudden darkness broke the spell. Akali’s mind rushed back to her with the force of a baseball bat to the face.

Despite the warning, she still clawed at the lasher. The smooth, warm leather turning to iron at her defiance. “Are they going to die?” She may have despised her parents, hated them even, but she didn’t want them to _die_. That would just be more blood on her hands and by god they were already filthy.

“No.” Ahri proclaimed, her voice sounded like a thousand voices at once. “I’ll just skim the last hour or so of their memories. They’ll remember coming to dinner, but the they won’t recall why they’ll be sore in the morning.” Akali felt her chest tighten with every word, her body kicking into fight or flight as her mind recognised the awesome power of the being sitting right next to her.

This was her fault; the whole situation arose because she decided to run away when things got too much. She should have tried harder to make the others stay at home, _she should have tried._

The lasher loosened slightly, turning soft again with the lack of fight. She took advantage, shoving the lasher off and quickly wrapping her arms around Ahri, pulling the fox’s back to her front. Ahri yelped, her jaw clicking shut and cutting off the light within her.

Everyone was blinded for a second as their eyes adjusted to the comparatively dimly lit hall. Botan lay still beneath them, his skin pallid with sweat. His eyes looked manic, pupils pinpricks as they darted quickly. Akali had never seen the expression on him before. The man now was at complete juxtaposition to the man who had thrown his fist at her earlier.

Botan felt _fear._

“Wait Ahri, don’t do it.” She hushed into a fox ear, her arms loose. God it would be so delicious to give in, to take something away from her parents when they took so much from her.

“But you just said-”

“I know _I know_.” She looked over to her mother’s bound form, the absolute murder in her eyes making the decision all that much harder. No, Akali would be the bigger person here, “But I rather live with the consequences than make you do something you hate.”

“I’d rather do something I hate than compromise someone l love.”

Despite her words, Ahri eased up. Her clawed hands- when did they turn to claws?- loosened slightly around the tree trunk arms they bound. Akali’s father, to his merit, didn’t take advantage and decided to play it cool instead. For that, Akali was grateful.

Hopping off his legs and loosening her tie, she addressed both of her parents. “We do that which must be done.” She watched how her mother stiffened at the familiar phrase. “ _We_ are choosing to walk away from this fight so long as you do not engage with us. I’ll meet you at dawn tomorrow to commence the ceremony and then we will leave. From them on we will have no interaction whatsoever.

Do you agree to this truce?”

Silence- the tension so thick you could cut it with a knife.

“I said, do you agree to this truce?” Akali emphasised the point, her hands clenching at her sides. She knew she was playing with fire here. No one left the family unharmed, and yet here she was still with both of her hands. It was another thing to directly attack the Kinkou Order’s leaders and still exit the grounds with your life. Mayym had made it clear that Akali was no daughter of hers, so the rapper didn’t think they’d make an exception.

She just _hoped_ that Ahri had scared them enough that they’d have half a braincell to just agree to the terms and be done with it.

“Don’t make me ask this again. You will lose this fight.” Akali really hoped they didn’t notice the way her body swayed slightly.

Honestly, it was like pulling teeth, but eventually Mayym and Botan agreed. Evelynn let Mayym go, ghosting over to Kai’Sa’s side and the both of them helped Ahri up. Botan sat, the colour returning to his cheeks botchy and feverish as he glared at them all. No more words were passed, none was needed.

Her parents would keep their word, Akali knew that.

\--

“Bokkie I can’t believe you fucking did that.” Ahri exclaimed, all her tails waving as they entered the guest house.

“No one talks about my girl like that and gets away with it.”

Akali brushed past them both, shoulder checking the dancer and unbuttoning her shirt hastily. Her face felt tense, hot and she just knew she was about to cry. She disrobed down the hallway, leaving a trail of clothes towards the bathroom uncaringly. They all gave her a wide birth, Evelynn even going so far as to flatten herself against the hallway’s wall so that Akali could pass. Kai’Sa’s shoulders dropped anxiously at the sight; the way Evelynn’s jaw clenched spoke volumes about how royally she had fucked up.

\--

The water burned when it hit her body, turning the skin an angry red and yet Akali still wanted it to be hotter. She needed it to be hotter. She wanted to feel the skin peel from her muscles in neat layers, she needed her tendons to snap from her bones and uncoil until she was just a pile of gore seeping down the drain.

The bathroom misted up quickly, the open window doing nothing to negate the amount of steam turning the walls wet and the mirror opaque. The high pressure pushed the water hard against her back and yet she wanted it to punch her. She wanted the wind knocked out her lungs so she could breathe no longer. Breathing was laborious- a constant squeezing and relaxing of lungs that ached with every laboured inhale.

Her mishappen hands wrapped around her throat. Her short, strong fingers indented the skin with force and shaky rage. She pressed. Her palms pushing in until her breath ceased and burned in her lungs. Her chest roared with betrayal, angry at the actions of her hands as her heart beat louder to compensate.

Apparently, it was impossible to strangle yourself with your bare hands.

It didn’t stop her from trying.

She held out far longer than she should have- her vision swimming to match the water cascading down her back. She gasped, hands flopping to her side as she lost against her biology. Her chest heaved until her lungs filled with the heavy, moist air and then heaved some more as if to mock her.

Akali dunked her head in the stream then, the water taking a second to penetrate her thick hair and helping flatten the tresses against her skull. She ran a hand up her side, supressing the flinch as her fingers found the steadily forming bruise where the table had met her side.

She pressed.

Biting her tongue, she let the pain wash over her. She _needed_ it to ground her, to situate her mind in her body and realise that her parents didn’t. fucking. care. She was now nothing to them, she probably _never_ was anything to them. She’d run away and they’d disowned her just like that. They hadn’t even given chase when she ran out those front gates, they hadn’t bothered to look for her when she slept on the streets of Kyoto before busking enough (and stealing enough) money to make her way to Busan. They didn’t even contact her when she debuted.

She was a means to an end and that’s all she ever was.

It was only when she tasted salt that Akali realised that she was crying. Her shoulders jerked with the force of it, the supressed whines pulling from abused lungs and muffled behind shaking palms. Her eyes closed, plunging the world into darkness, and letting the white noise of water fill all her senses.

“O, my liefling.”

Akali jumped, turning around so fast she almost slipped as she shut the water off and held out a knife hand to the intruder’s throat. Still her limbs shook with an unknown force, her chest heaving as her eyes stung. She was met with a violet gaze and a calm, albeit sheepish smile.

_Kai’Sa._

Her hand lowered, her body slackening as the dancer entered the shower properly- closing the door behind her. The shower wasn’t all that large, forcing the two of them to press in close until only the width of one hand separated them. Still, Kai’Sa respected the boundary enough to not to pull Akali any closer.

“What are you doing here, Kai’Sa?” Her voice warbled despite her best efforts; the words laborious on her tongue.

It took a moment for Kai’Sa to respond. Akali watched as Kai’Sa’s gaze took in her defeated form. Her dark brows furrowing deeper and deeper at the redness of her skin, at the blooming bruise on her side, and the slowly forming fingerprints collaring her neck.

Akali swallowed a little nervously. Her mind in utter fucking turmoil as her vision started to blacken once again.

“I just wanted to tell you that I love you.”

“Oh.”

_Oh._

“May I touch you?”

In lieu of answering, Akali just closed the gap- ducking her head down and leaning forward until her forehead connected to Kai’Sa’s still clothed chest. The dancer’s arms circled her waist, neither puling her closer nor pushing her away. The feel of Kai’Sa’s rising chest was a metronome against the violence of Akali’s own- something stable and sure when nothing really made sense anymore.

Her breath puffed against the starched material as long fingers tangled in her hair. The black strands clung to Kai’Sa’s fingers as she pulled them apart methodically, digits making quick work of organising the chaos and teasing apart stubborn knots.

“I want you to match my breathing, okay? Do you think you can do that?” Kai’Sa hushed, placing a soft peck against her double crown.

Akali nodded, her hands- heavy and cumbersome- latched onto Kai’Sa’s dinner shirt. The material crinkled under her palms as they took the full weight of too heavy limbs. Kai’Sa took it in stride, not even dipping a little with the sudden addition.

They breathed together.

One.

Two.

Three.

_Hold._

Three.

Two.

One.

_Out._

Time stood still as they repeated the motion over and over, inhaling and exhaling like it was their job. Slowly, oh so slowly, but surely Akali’s lungs got the hang of breathing again. Her ribcage didn’t feel so tight, her stomach settled to a simmer and her mind quietened with the force of Kai’Sa’s care.

They stood in silence for a while. Kai’Sa eventually continued with her ministrations, grabbing a bottle of shampoo off the inbuilt shelf and squirting a generous helping onto Akali’s head. She began to lather it with sweeping circular motions. Soap suds puffed into existence, crowning Akali’s head and turning dark strands white as it cleaned. Once Kai’Sa was satisfied, the hair was gathered into a twisted cord before strong fingers massaged her neck.

If Akali could purr, she would have.

She felt Kai’Sa lean forward, the water turning on a moment later as the warmth hit her back. It definitely wasn’t as hot as it was before- the dancer had somehow eyeballed the perfect temperature right off the bat. Kai’Sa maneuvered them under the spray, her formal shirt and pants were quick to drink up the moisture and turn heavy with its weight.

“Bokkie, your clothes.” The words were softer than she would have liked them. “You’ll ruin them.”

Still, Kai’Sa heard. “I’d buy a thousand more shirts if it meant I could spend this one moment with you.”

Akali chuckled lowly, pulling back to look Kai’Sa in the eyes. “That was incredibly cheesy.”

A broad smile stretched across a perfect face, “maybe so, but it’s the truth.” She leaned forward, face coming so close that Akali closed her eyes. Two featherlight kisses were placed against her eyelids before she felt Kai’Sa step away. “Hurt and grieve, but don’t suffer alone. We are _all_ here for you.”

Akali looked away, turning her back and instead choosing to rinse her hair.

“Why did you come, Kai’Sa?”

“I was waiting by the door, contemplating coming in here for the last fifteen or so minutes.”

“Surely I haven’t been in here that long?”

Kai’Sa grabbed the bar of soap from the shelf, lathering it between her hands before running her palms over Akali’s back. “It’s been an hour.”

“Fuck.”

“My decision was made for me when Eve all but pushed me in here whilst muttering about burnt coffee.”

“ _Fuck._ ”

\--

“Where are we going?”

“My old room. There’s something I want to get while I’m still here.”

Akali looked back, her hand steady in Kai’Sa’s own as she dragged her down a long hall.

“Shouldn’t we have brought Eve and Ahri?”

“They were busy on the phone with something or another.”

“At this hour? It’s literally 11pm, I wonder what it could be.”

“Beats me.”

\--

Akali stood in front of an unfamiliar door that closed the entrance to a very familiar room. The door was nondescript- stock standard for the building and completely passable to the average person. To Akali, however, it was another smack in the gut.

“That hadn’t been there before.”

“What hadn’t?” Kai’Sa looked between her girlfriend and the door, confusion evident on her face.

Akali gripped the handle, turning it smoothly and swinging the door inwards. “The door. I didn’t have a door.”

Kai’Sa paused, pulling Akali back via their connected hands before she could so much as even take a peek inside. The rapper looked over her shoulder, a brow raised in askance.

“Do you not hear anything wrong with that statement?”

Wrong with the statement? She wracked her brain but still came up empty handed. Sure she didn’t like not having a door, but it wasn’t the worst thing in the world. The area her room was in was fairly uninhabited in a secluded building off the main campus. It’s was mostly storage rooms and a lone practice room that no one, aside from Akali, used- so she had her run of the place really. Sure her mother would drop in unannounced and had the only key to the building that she refused to let Akali touch, and sure sometimes her mother would lock her in the building but that’s mainly because she asked for it.

“No?” Akali shook her head, “Look, Bokkie,” she cut Kai’Sa off before she could speak, “let’s just go in and out. I wanna grab my thing and then hit the hay. I’m knackered.”

Kai’Sa’s jaw clicked shut, her hand slackening as Akali pulled them through.

Only to stop at the threshold.  
  
“Akali, this is a storage room.”

Akali dropped her hand, her eyes wide and mouth ajar. In a split second, she blurred into motion. Her footsteps were frantic as she ran around the room. Boxes caked with dust and old equipment covered in sheets took up the majority of what was once her bedroom. The posters that used to litter the walls were all gone, only the blu tack residue gave any indication that they had existed at all.

Anything and everything that made this room hers had been purged. Even the stupid drawings she once doodled on the walls were painted over, erased from existence. This room had been her life for 18 years and now it was nothing more than dust, cardboard and the memory that lived on in her mind.

“Just say the word, and I’ll kill them.”

Akali looked back at her lover, eyebrows so far up her forehead they almost kissed her hair line. Kai’Sa was the picture of malevolent rage. Her tall frame was ridged with it, her fists balled into steel and second skin tessellating down her forearms.

“…why?”

Kai’Sa downright exploded. “What do you mean fucking _why,_ Akali? Do you not see how they treat you?” Spittle flew from her mouth, her feet taking menacing steps forward but Akali stood her ground.

“Tonight was the worst they’ve ever been.”

Kai’Sa started pushing her backwards, pressing her body against the wall and pinning her to the plaster via her strong hips.

“You didn’t have a _door_. _”_

“What does that have anything to do with anything?” She was genuinely confused. “I honestly deserved it.”

Kai’Sa stilled. Akali would have been convinced that Kai’Sa’s eyes were glowing if she didn’t know any better. “Pray tell, how old were you when they took your door away?”

Akali gulped, dropping her head back softly against the wall. Her hands came up to rest at the dancer’s hips, thumbs stroking the dip in muscles that made up her Adonis belt. “I was 14.”

“Kak, Akali that’s child abuse.”

Her breath stilled, her eyes turning misty all of a sudden. “Of course not. Remember that chicken story with Kennen?” Kai’Sa nodded, her eyes never leaving the rapper’s blue, “well, my Otousan came in looking for Kennen and saw me drinking. So, they took my door as punishment. That’s it, that’s all.”

“No,” warm hands cupped her cheeks, thumbs lovingly wiping away spilling tears, “Taking away the door for a few days and getting you to understand the gravity of your actions, sure, that’s not the best but it’s fine. But you literally didn’t have a door for years. They took away your privacy when they could and just never gave it back.” She took a breath, leaning in closer and resting her forehead against the rapper’s. “And I’m pretty sure it’s illegal to leave a minor unattended and alone like that.”

“Oh they locked me in here after class, so it wasn’t like I was meant to be able to get out and hurt myself. Not that it stopped me from finding a way out- I was nifty like that.”

“Holy _fuck._ That’s even worse. _”_

Akali knew that tone and she didn’t want to hear it. With solid hands, she pushed at the hips under her palms. Ever the gentleman, Kai’Sa let herself be moved but not before placing a soft kiss on even softer skin. Akali’s heart felt like it was ready to burst from her chest and run for the hills.

Akali gave her a heavy smile, “Bygones, Kai’. We can’t change the past so there’s no point worrying about it, okay?” She grabbed one of Kai’Sa’s limp hands, admiring the way her second skin glimmered in the low light. She pressed the palm against her lips, closing her eyes and holding it there for a second. “Don’t worry about them. You already got in a lucky shot with my mother, so I think they get the memo.”

The hand fell from her grasp, Kai’Sa visibly deflating from the reminder. “God, jammer Akali. I’m so _sorry_. We’d promised to not cause as scene and that’s exactly what I did.”

“Don’t worry about it.” She waved it off flippantly but her voice told the truth. “Thank you for taking onus.”

She would be lying if Akali said she didn’t enjoy it. The shocked expression on her Okkasan’s face was enough to make all of this turmoil almost worth it. The way her head had snapped to the side? Well, that was poetic justice at its finest.

“You did the thing I’ve been too chicken shit to do.”

Kai’Sa still didn’t look convinced. Despite that, her second skin regressed back under her shirt as if to hide from the harsh world of Akali’s old home.

Silence settled between them, thick and grave but quiet in the night. Akali took the opportunity to thread her arm through her companion’s, tugging Kai’Sa along gently to a side door. She had no idea what lay behind it. The last time Akali had been here it had been her closet, now she couldn’t be surprised if it was just more storage.

She was only partially wrong.

The door gave way silently, swinging open and revealing a room of pitch blackness. Kai’Sa stilled beside her, forcing Akali to look over and see how pale her face had gotten. Kai’Sa’s eyesight was leagues above her own, her ability to be able to see in low light was a very useful skill in sneaking food from the kitchen (and something Ahri liked to take advantage of when they were having movie nights and a group).

Akali’s brows furrowed. She couldn’t think of a single thing that would broker this reaction. All that would be in here would be clothes or boxes- nothing to make Kai’Sa look as shocked as she did right now.

She flicked the light on.

_Oh._

Akali’s eyes widened, her body clenching at the sight of a past that haunted her.

They had left it up. They had turned her whole room over, they had cleaned out her closet, but they had left _it_ up.

“Kai-”

“Akali, why is there a noose hanging in your closet?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, uh, yeahhhhhhh  
> You just finished 15k words ahhhh! Thank you for reading this ridiculously long, sad chapter! I hope you have an awesome day :D  
> Don't forget to comment, I love hearing what you guys think and it helps keep me motivated :)  
> Cheers!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, have a great day!
> 
> (this was just pure self indulgence)


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